#have a wonderful 2022 💕
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laurenillustrated · 1 year ago
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I’m sure you’ve been question loads but I think your art is gorgeous and it really inspires me, so i was just wondering how/when you found your style (like have you always drawn similar to this, or did it used to be more cartoony/realistic) because i’m really struggling with that line between stylising and still having recognisable human proportions lol
love your work 💕
Thank you so much! And I’ve only really been drawing like this current style since this summer 😅 over the last 5 years my style has changed almost every month lol you can even scroll down to my posts last year and see it’s totally different. I think only the last couple months I’ve stuck with this more painterly, children’s illustration style with semi-realistic proportions.
For a while my style was very influenced by modern cartoons and anime but my style changes with my interests! Now I’m more into art nouveau, late 19th - early 20th century illustration as well as children’s books from my childhood. But that could even change by next year and I try not to worry about it :)
Best tip I’ve heard and what I’ve been saying for a while is just try to find a few different artists you really like and take reference when you’re creating your own work. You’ll see as you practice the small influences from each artist shows up in your work creating a whole new style!
Here’s just a few comparisons to see some of the changes over the years.
Wirt (2020 vs 2023), Coraline (2022 vs 2023)
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ahundredtimesover · 2 years ago
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Belong (01) | MYG
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Pairing: Yoongi x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: exes-to-lovers-to-exes-to-lovers; actress!OC x basketball coach!Yoongi; summer romance; “long” distance relationship; parallel timelines; angst, fluff, smut
Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, family drama, sport injury; dreams & moving away; implied depression; basketball and acting talk; 2014 and 2022 Yoongi; shy and nonchalant cocky whipped Yoongi; explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter (18+)
Chapter Word count: 14.2k
Series Masterlist
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Status: Complete
Series summary: Being an actor has always been your dream. Pursuing it meant many things - leaving the town where you grew up, distancing yourself from your family that had fallen apart, and saying goodbye to the man who made you feel what home was like. When you decide to finally return after being away for so long, you meet Min Yoongi again, and you’re reminded of the summer romance from 8 years ago with the college basketball superstar whose broken dream pushed you away. As you find yourself spending time with him, you’re left to wonder if love changes, if it gives second chances, or if it’s just another illusion that will hurt the both of you the second time around.
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Listen to: Boston by Augustana; Shelter by Luca Fogale || Playlist đŸŽ¶
A/N: Posting this today to celebrate People pt.2 and D-Day! Here’s a little piece I’ve had for a while. It felt fitting to write something about dreams and finding your purpose through Yoongi and at a time when I’m going through something similar. There’s nothing like his wisdom and his warmth so I hope this could mean something to you somehow. 💕 Please enjoy! And đŸ«Ą to NBA Ambassador Suga! Now that’s his 🏀 dream in another form.
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Present Day
There’s always something magical whenever you watch yourself on screen. 
It’s not due to some narcissistic reason or an insatiable desire for the spotlight; it’s not even because you think you’re really talented. Sure, you like the attention and just like anyone who’s spent years of their lives perfecting their craft, you want to be pretty great at it, but all those thoughts become suspended whenever it’s your scene. 
During these instances, it’s only about your character and her emotions, and that’s what you think is remarkable about it - watching yourself is just like being there, in that moment, on that set, feeling it all. 
Most actors would say they love acting because it gives them a variety of roles and personalities to play. You like that bit, too, but it’s the character’s emotions that you commit yourself to the most; it’s being able to immerse yourself in the feelings of joy and anger, of contempt and fear, of envy and admiration, of guilt and love. You like the finiteness of it, that with acting comes the feeling, and you know at some point, it’s going to end. 
Once the scene is over, so is the emotion; you’re able to let go of it right away with one breath. You’re good at that, you think - holding onto something for as long as it’s yours, and then letting it go when it no longer is. 
The collective gasp of the people around you breaks your bubble only a little; you release a breath yourself as the last scene unfolds. And with the final shot and the succeeding transition to the end credits, you let go of the sadness.
“I can’t believe that only took one shot,” your best friend, Taehyung, says in awe. “I would’ve been crying already knowing how it ends.”
“Jin and I challenged each other,” you proudly say. “We said we’d do our absolute best for that first try and the director thought it was that good. Seriously, not crying until that last second was so hard; I didn’t think I could do it.”
The Kim Seokjin, your co-actor and good friend, looks at you from the other side of the couch with that soft and proud look that you only ever get from him once a project is over. You return the sentiment, knowing that you wouldn’t have survived your first lead role in a drama series if he wasn’t acting alongside you. 
He’d been your senior at university where you both took your major in acting. He was already modeling then and snagged a major role in a movie right after graduation; he became a household name after that. 
You watched from the sidelines as he achieved his dreams while you took the occasional 30-second roles given to the students, but he didn’t forget you. He called regularly to know how you were doing, gave tips when you asked, and informed you of upcoming auditions. 
It was the type of friendship that challenged you, given that you both wanted to one day star in a series or movie together, a culmination of all the long hours of rehearsals and line-reading and classes that you both did. He had already made a name for himself; you wanted to be good enough to have yours be opposite his. 
It would take a few years, but after a supporting role in a romcom movie that saw people wanting more of you, you and Jin finally got cast in a series about a mortal woman falling in love with a celestial being, which, at the beginning, reflected your respective statuses in the industry. You expected the show to do well - everything that Kim Seokjin touches turns to gold, as the saying goes - but you didn’t expect for the public to love you both as a pair as much as they do, given that they want you to star in another show right away. 
“I cried as I turned around,” Jin says of the scene where he had to go back to his world and leave you behind. “That was heavy and even I’m impressed we did it in one shot.”
“Well, the sadness and grief would have dwindled by the third or fourth time,” you chuckle. “I’m not good enough yet to maintain all the emotions after so many takes.”
“Not that you aren’t good enough,” Jin counters. “You just haven’t been in the industry that long yet. That kind of experience makes a difference. I’d say I wouldn’t have been able to sustain the same emotion for long, too. It was a difficult one. I mean, what goodbye scene isn’t?”
It’s a rhetorical question, of course, but much of why it was difficult for you to keep the emotions in was because it was your first goodbye scene. You have a feeling that the succeeding ones wouldn’t be any easier, though. You’d like to think you’re okay with goodbyes and that says a lot, but then again, you don’t know anyone who’s actually good at it.
Or maybe you do. But you’d rather not think about it.
It’s silent for a few more seconds. You suppose that the rest of your co-actors who are here with you are still processing the end of a series that’s been their source of comfort for the past few months, too. It had been your weekly routine to watch the episode together in Jin’s house, not wanting to let go of each other just yet after filming wrapped up a few weeks ago. 
“Well, that was amazing, wasn’t it?” He finally speaks up. “It was a good run and thank god that ___ insisted on these watch parties. Or else I’d be crying by myself in my room after the finale,” he laughs. “This better not be the last time we see each other.”
“Because it isn’t,” you reply. “We still have that cast and crew dinner and a couple more filming stuff for promo. That’s easily another 3 more weeks of being together. Which is really 3 weeks too short.”
“So
 does anyone want to go on a trip after that?” Hyun-seung, one of the actors, excitedly suggests. “It’d be a good way to unwind and use up what we’ll earn.”
You laugh along with everyone but you’re the only one who passes up on it. 
“I can’t,” you sigh. “I have a trip to Daegu at the end of the month and I can’t move it.”
Disappointed sighs echo throughout the living room, and you insist that they should continue with the trip without you. Most of them don’t want to, but you eye Jin so that he would make the call to push through with it even if you won’t be around, so he does. It’s rare to find such good company with other actors, and you truly want them to maintain the friendships they built here way beyond the series. 
Your friends make general plans as you listen in, wishing you could be there instead of home, which is where you’ll be for the next 2 months as you promised your family. Or more like, as they guiltripped you into doing. 
You haven’t been home in years and for good reason. After your parents separated and you were the lone child who didn’t harbor anger towards your mother who wanted to pursue her dreams elsewhere, you promised yourself you’d leave that place, too. 
Visits during summer had been fine. But after the most painful goodbye you ever made, you’d stopped going back altogether, reasoning that your up and coming career required all your time. You doubt that your family knew the truth, and despite their remarks of you following in the footsteps of your mother, those weren’t enough for you to open up about something so heartbreaking, knowing it hit too close to home. Their bitterness wasn’t a reason for you to keep going back either. 
“Daegu, really?” Jin asks after everyone else has left, save for Taehyung and Jimin, your personal assistant whose glassy eyes say he’s not yet over the season finale. “You haven’t been home in 6 years.”
“Four, actually,” you correct him. “I had a filming there sometime ago.”
“Yeah, but you didn’t actually go home,” he clarifies. “You went to the shoot then back to your hotel. I remember that; I kept asking Tae how you were doing.”
“I was fine,” you shrug. “How was I supposed to be? I was good, just couldn’t wait to get back here. I had a boyfriend, remember?”
“Andrew was a fling, not a boyfriend,” Jin rolls his eyes, and you confirm that the model is his least favorite of your exes. “And if I remember correctly, you broke it off days later.”
“Well, it stops being good when it stops being fun,” Taehyung says, mocking your usual statement whenever your friends ask why you broke things off with your partners. “She shut down when she came back. I guess going home does that to her.”
“You know how places just naturally comfort you? Daegu isn’t that place,” you try to explain. “I had to get it off my system for the one week I was there and Andrew acted out. I just didn’t want the drama.”
Everyone nods, knowing it’s how you usually are. You always viewed relationships as a complement to your job. Being an actor is tough work with its own complications and you definitely don’t want it from your partner. It was always easy for you to fall into that honeymoon hole with someone, but you always walked away from it just as quick once the rainbows and butterflies had subsided. Whether it’s jealousy over your leading men or not having enough time, or just wanting to be by yourself to regroup, your exes always found a reason to argue. And you were always good at walking away when you needed to.
It was like that with every person. Except one. Your friends don’t know if he’s the reason why, or if he’s the exception.
“So what made you decide to go home? And for how long?” Jin queries, feeling a little worried because of what he knows is out there for you. He’s always been a little protective like that.
“About 2 months?” You respond, to the surprise of the older man. “My dad wants me to celebrate his wedding anniversary with them. And spend time with my sisters’ kids and my grandparents and shit.”
“And spend time with my parents,” Taehyung adds, knowing it’s probably the only thing you’re excited about, given how much they adore you and vice versa. “They can’t wait to see you.”
“Same here,” you finally smile. “We’re definitely seeing them first.”
“Anyone else you’re going to see there?” Jin asks some more.
“You can say his name, you know?” You nudge your friend’s knee. “I know he’s who you mean.”
“Well then. Are you going to see Yoongi?”
“I don’t plan on seeing him but I probably will. It’s a big city but it’s a small town. Plus, I’m with Daegu’s Prince right here,” you say, pointing to your best friend who’s made a name for himself as a ballad singer. “Tae will be dragging me around so I won’t be surprised if I encounter Yoongi somehow, somewhere.”
“And what happens when you see him?” Jimin now asks, wanting to know if he’d need to drive to you in case you decide to come home early. 
“Then I see him. We’re
 fine,” you state, earning you an eye roll from each man, so you clarify. “I mean, I’m perfectly fine living my dream in Seoul. And he’s a college basketball coach in Daegu, which is the closest to his dream he could get, and I heard his team’s doing really well. It’s been 6 years. He let me go. And I’ve moved on. Who knows how it’s gonna be like? But I’m civil with each one of my exes and it won’t be any different with him.”
“He’s different, though,” Jimin points out. “You actually loved him; you can’t say the same for all your exes. And you can’t argue that,” he adds, seeing your shaking head and disagreeing face. “Drunk and hungover you told me all that more than once and I trust that version of you over the sober one when it comes to your love life.”
“Okay, Mr. Know-It-All,” you frown at him. “I wasn’t going to deny that but it was the naive, impulsive, hopeless romantic version of me who loved him. That’s not me anymore. I’ve grown up. I know what I want from my partner, and Yoongi is just the small town boy who’ll always think that his broken dreams will keep him from loving me the way I deserve. And maybe he’s right.”
It’s quiet for a while, as your friends take in your words since you rarely ever talk about the man unless you’re in an inebriated state or recovering from it. But it’s the first time that the possibility of seeing him looms over you, knowing that within those 2 months, you’re bound to run into him somehow. 
Now it’s too quiet, and you realize that none of you know what to say since you’re all sober. Truth be told, you don’t remember anything that Jimin’s ever told you during those times that you opened up, and Jin never really said much, knowing how hard that breakup hit you. And Taehyung, well
 the man was there before, during, and after it all, yet he never really said much, always choosing to let the silence engulf both of you.
“Look, I’m touched you all seem to be worried,” you finally speak up. “But I’m going to be fine. I found a house I’m renting that’s nice and private. I’m actually excited to eat at my favorite restaurants and visit places I’ve missed. I can’t do anything about my family but at least Tae will be with me the whole time and save me from their madness if he needs to. And Yoongi, well
 he’s a closed chapter in my book. There’s no reason to revisit that. Hi, goodbye - that’ll be it, just like before.”
You sigh to yourself, hoping that your friends would take your word for it, though you don’t really blame them if they don’t. They’ve seen you barely bat an eye after calling it quits with your exes but they’ve heard of how broken you were because of that breakup; seeing Yoongi again might just bring up old memories that you might not be ready for. And they won’t all be there to lift you up like they’d want to. 
“Okay then, if you say so,” Jin finally smiles. “But if something comes up
 you know I can always drive there and bring you back here.”
“And add to the already existing rumors about us being a thing?” You laugh, referring to all the social media fodder about your chemistry that’s too good, it might be real. 
“So? Then we let it,” he shrugs.
“Does the Kim Seokjin not care about dating rumors?” You gasp. “You always complained about it. Don’t tell me you like me.”
Jin sits next to you and cups your face in his hands. “I
 love you. The way a dear friend who dreamed with you and who gets to live that out with you does. We all love you. We’d do anything for you. You know that, right?”
“I do,” you say, humming once he plants a soft kiss on your forehead, just like all the times he’d done before - when you graduated university, when you didn’t get callbacks, and when you landed your first major role. “Thank you.”
You decide to head out after a long evening. Jimin lists your activities for the next day before he’s dropped off at his apartment. Taehyung lets you listen to his new single for his upcoming album, and you get emotional over his soulful sound and the fact that he gets to live out his dream with you, too.
He walks you to your front door and hugs you tightly, just like all the times he’d done before - when you cried about your family, when Yoongi broke up with you, and when you found out he was dating someone new. 
“I love you, okay?” Your best friend whispers. 
He says it in that soft, comforting voice of his. The one that always told you that things were gonna be fine, as if love solves all things, and at one point, you believed it did. 
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Your hometown of Daegu looks very different from the last time you were really here. It changed a lot. And it changed pretty quickly. 
But some things about it stay the same - family-run restaurants, streets lined with little shops passed down from generations, the parks and the temples, the playground in your old neighborhood with the basketball court that you know all too well.
They make the place home, Mrs. Kim says. That doesn’t change no matter how far or how long you’ve been away. 
You want to disagree. This place was never home. It felt like bits of it during the times you used to watch ballet performances at the Opera House with your mom or when your dad used to grill makchang on Friday nights. 
But when she decided to leave and then he remarried, you had just memories of home left. Your sisters’ resentment over your happiness for your mother as she achieved her dreams took all that was remaining, and coming here reminds you more than what you lost; it reminds you of what you can never have - that space to dream, the place of safety, the love that would endure time and distance. 
You enjoy the best short ribs dish over Mr. Kim’s recordings of his saxophone performances. Mrs. Kim dotes on you like her own daughter, and Taehyung announces all the things you’ll be doing now that you’re both back home, taking your respective breaks that you deserve, and spending the money that you worked hard for. 
You eventually leave for some rest. The house you’re staying at is far from the buzz of the city. It’s private and secure, a little too spacious for one, and boasts of the views of the mountains. Jimin had found it, knowing you’d need the peace and quiet amidst all that would be taking place during your short time here. 
Taehyung will be staying over at his parents’ place, but they insist that it’s open for you to visit anytime you want. You think you need the time for yourself, though. Your job often requires you to be around people, and you’re thankful for the choice you have now to be away from them. For some time, at least.
[From: Manager Jung] Are you settled? I’ve got a script for you to go through. Sending it now 
Your agent-slash-manager’s message disrupts your moment of tranquility as you sit out at the garden, watching the sun set. You’d arrived from Seoul in time for lunch and spent the rest of the afternoon at Taehyung’s parents’ house before heading to yours. 
[To: Manager Jung] Yeah, all good. But give me a week until I read the script. Don’t want to think much about work yet 
[From: Manager Jung] Fine. Just don’t take too long 
You sigh, knowing that though you promised Jin and Jimin that you won’t be thinking about work while you’re here - you need a break from it all, they told you - your manager won’t really let you. And much as you want to complain about him pushing you real hard, you’re thankful that Jung Hoseok always does. 
He was the one who saw your talent and insisted you’ve got a bright future after one casting call that you were almost late for. He was strategic in which roles to pitch you for as a rookie actor, and which ones would get you ahead of the game, no matter how challenging it was. During the times you wondered if you were meant for this industry, he always assured you that you were. There was always going to be a bigger break after the last, he believed, and he promised you he’d go searching for that role until you got the biggest break of your career. 
And every time you think he’ll cross the line of pressuring you too much, he says something sweet, brotherly, friendly. 
[From: Manager Jung] But take care of yourself there, ok? Don’t let them talk down on you. Don’t let them crush your dreams 
You’d cry if his words came with a hug.
[From: Manager Jung] And guard your heart. Don’t let him hurt you again 
You pretend he means your father; he let your sisters’ resentment of you go on after all, and his inaction made you feel unloved in your own home. 
You don’t want to think that Hoseok means someone else because it would mean that for all the times you questioned if everything you gave up to chase your dream was worth it, then he knew it was because of the man who broke your heart 6 years ago. You don’t want to think that all these years, Hoseok knew that your buzz-worthy dating life, whose aftermath he always had to manage, was just your futile attempt at getting over the first and only man you ever loved. 
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Being in any sports facility unsettles you. You always claim that the buzz of sporting events just isn’t your cup of tea - you prefer the noise of a film or television set, or of a theater right before the movie starts. It wasn’t always like that, of course. You used to enjoy the screams and heckles of sports fans; you used to be one of them. 
But you found out the hard way that losing someone means you lose the parts of you that you’d adopted because of them, that you fall out of love with the things you used to love because of them.
Basketball is one of those things. It’s why Taehyung used to not invite you whenever there were Thunders games at Jamsil despite the free tickets always available for you; he knew you’d say no and he hates rejection. 
But Mr. Song is a man you can’t say no to. Not only is he the city’s mayor, he’s also a good friend of your father’s, which is how the chief official got wind of your return. 
Your trip isn’t meant to be publicized. Actors take breaks and visit their hometowns regularly without attracting the media, and oftentimes, that’s thanks to the local government, who employs their political will and own security to ensure that celebrities aren’t disturbed while they’re on vacation or just visiting family. It’s good for them, of course, but it also sometimes comes with small favors, like a private dinner with some of their close friends and some photos or autographs. You don’t really mind, especially since the same is extended to Taehyung, hence why the lunch earlier at the mayor’s residence wasn’t all that bad. It was only slightly awkward with your father because you chose to meet up with Taehyung’s family first before yours, but your dad didn’t dwell on it. 
Other than privacy, one other thing you get are free courtside Korean Basketball League tickets. The Pegasus just recently moved to Daegu from Incheon and there’d been a lot of promotion to get the city to give their full support to their new hometown team. Mr. Song thinks that photos of you and Taehyung attending the game will be the publicity that the team needs, and while your best friend genuinely agrees to the arrangement, you only do so half-heartedly. You’ll at least see your friends who are playing for the other team, but even the thought of Jungkook and Namjoon being back home and the party they’ll throw after is making you even more unsettled. 
“Hmm, number 16 was pretty cute,” you whisper to Taehyung as you head out of the locker room after some photos with the home team. “I wonder if he’ll be at the party tonight.”
“No, he won’t,” your best friend responds. 
“Why not? Because he’s from the other team? I’m sure that Jungkook won’t mind, right? I mean, yeah it’s his house but—”
“Tonight is for college friends only.”
“We didn’t even go to their university,” you point out, given that you and Taehyung studied in Seoul and had met there, instantly clicking after finding out you both hailed from the same city. “Why are we going?”
“We are honorary members,” he replies. “I went to high school with them and you
” he trails, trying to figure out how to phrase how you became an honorary member of their group of friends without bringing him up. 
“Are the ex of one of their friends,” you finish for him. “You can say it, you know?”
“I don’t know, can I?” He arches a brow.
“Yes. I don’t deny the fact that Yoongi and I dated.”
“You just deny how much it affected you.”
“You mistake my amazing ability of moving on for denial,” you groan. “But oh shit. Wait. Does this mean that he’ll be there at the party?”
Taehyung huffs as he settles in his seat and looks at your worried eyes. “For someone who doesn’t seem to be in denial, you sure look a bit anxious that he might be there tonight. Didn’t you say you can be civil with your exes?”
“Yeah, I can,” you reply defensively. “I don’t know about him. But then again, he moved on first, so I doubt seeing me would affect him much.”
Your best friend lets out a breath, not wanting to argue. He’s learned long ago that when it comes to Yoongi, you’re dead set on many things - like the narrative that he moved on first, that he was so much happier without you, that dreams were always more important for him, whether it was yours or his. Taehyung tried to help you process that whole experience, especially the aftermath, as you went on dating one man after another after you found out about Yoongi dating some local musician. 
But you always had a default answer, that you’ve always been that way - quick to fall in love and quick to fall out of it, and Yoongi was no exception. You met, fell in love, and while you technically didn’t fall out of love, the breakup left you no choice but to do just that; he was the one who insisted that you leave, after all, and you’d been the one too heartbroken that he didn’t love you enough to make you stay.
“Well then let’s just see what happens,” Taehyung shrugs. “We’ve got a game to watch, a party to go to, and friends to catch up with.”
“And a nice, peaceful home to retire to after tonight. I’ll need all the good energy before I see the rest of my family tomorrow,” you sigh.
Right, there’s that, Taehyung frowns. Your family’s too complicated that you insist you don’t want him to get sucked into the drama, hence why you don’t want him to go with you. But between that and the possibility of seeing your ex, he could only hope that during this trip, you won’t get your heart broken too early, too quickly, or too hard.
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“How is it that the Pegasus have been playing here for months but it’s the first time we’re watching their game live?” Geumjae asks incredulously as he sips his beer. 
“Because it’s the first home game of the season against the Thunders when I’m home and when Jungkook and Namjoon don’t have girlfriends to give their tickets to,” Yoongi explains to his older brother. “And well, I never asked before.”
“Well, good on us that you’re here and your friends currently don’t have girlfriends,” Geumjae laughs. “Also, you could totally ask. They’re your friends; I don’t think it would be that hard for them to get extra seats for us.”
“I’m not their only friend here. I’m sure a bunch of the guys from college would ask,” Yoongi shrugs. 
“You’re not just their friend, Yoon,” his brother groans. “You played with them, you captained them, and led them to college championships.”
“Yeah, yet I’m the one hustling it out as a college coach while they’re playing pro,” the younger man huffs. 
He doesn’t mean to be bitter. He loves those guys, hustled it out with them until the late evenings just to get the proper training and workout in almost a decade ago. He couldn't be any prouder when Jungkook and Namjoon got drafted to professional teams and then reunited as teammates with the Seoul Samsung Thunders just 2 years ago. Yoongi had been the encouraging senior who messaged them right away, happy for his peers for being together again just like old times. He won’t lie and say it didn’t sting a bit to be left out from the life they all dreamed of having, with him being the only one who didn’t get to achieve it alongside them. 
“Well, if it matters at all, you’re doing amazing,” Geumjae tries to cheer his brother up. “I read online that many are calling your team to win it all this year. Imagine being the only person in your school’s history to be a champion player and coach? Not just anyone can say that.”
Yoongi hums, trying to let the thought comfort him. It doesn’t do much; coaching a college basketball team is leagues away from playing professionally. The energy is different, so is the hustle. Shooting hoops with the kids during training isn’t the same. The lights and the cheers as he sits on the bench calling plays isn’t the same either. He can at least say that with coaching, he’s able to shape and mentor the young ones, direct them to better paths, encourage them to reach their dreams, and to not settle for a life they’re not happy with or proud of. He’s got a bunch of players who got drafted last year and dedicated their first professional game to him, and that’s an indescribable feeling he’ll always hold onto. It reminds him that even if it wasn’t him, it was at least someone he cared about. 
He watches as the players do their warmups on court before the start of the game. This isn’t the first time he’s watched live, but it’s the first time with Jungkook and Namjoon as teammates, so seeing them goof around and do the handshake that they used to do warms his heart a little. Maybe it’s this bit of joy that he needs to remind him that it’s okay, that even if life turned out differently for him, at least basketball is still part of his life. There’s more he wants, of course, but this is way better than nothing. He reminds himself at one point, he didn’t think he could ever set foot on a basketball court again.
The game finally starts and though he’s usually quiet whenever he watches games, he can’t help the small small cheer he makes whenever Jungkook or Namjoon scores or makes crucial plays. He still knows their moves, can still read Jungkook’s pump-fake, and can still tell by Namjoon’s stance if he’s gonna make that rare three. Though he was a shooting guard during his glory days, Yoongi still prides himself in his playmaking skills and knowing his teammates well, something that scouts used to rave about. 
Yoongi sips his beer, no doubt enjoying the exciting match. He obviously wants the Thunders to win, but the Pegasus aren’t backing down, not letting themselves trail by more than 8 points. He’s in a bit of a trance, as he lets himself drown in the cheers of the crowd, imagining that it’s him leaving it all out on the court. 
But as he looks up on the big screen during timeout, he feels like the air is being sucked out of him. His ears don’t betray them either, as the announcer calls on your name and Taehyung’s - “celebrity sightings,” he says, while you and your best friend wave to the camera and smile like the superstars that you both are. The cheers get louder and Geumjae joins them until he realizes.
“Shit, that’s your ex-girlfriend,” he whisper-shouts. He laughs at the scene of his brother practically choking on his drink. “Wow, she still has that effect on you, huh?”
“No, she doesn’t,” Yoongi says nonchalantly, desperately forcing his heart to slow its beating. 
“Did you know she’s gonna be here?”
“I don’t keep tabs on her whereabouts, Geumjae,” he replies, suddenly sounding hard, defensive.
“Do you think she’s gonna be at the party?”
Fuck, the party, Yoongi slightly panics. Jungkook talked about the sort of reunion he’s throwing at his house after the game. Their old teammates will be there, as well as some other friends from college who are still in the city. You and Taehyung were honorary members of that group and Yoongi knows that you’re both invited, too.
“I guess,” he merely shrugs, looking like it doesn’t bother him much. 
It shouldn’t. It’s been 6 years, and while he’d been the one to break it off, you’re the one who’s dated a lot since then, something he can’t fault you for. You’d obviously catch a lot of attention - you did catch his - not just for your charm and unbelievable beauty but for your talent as well. He’s not surprised that you’re rumored to be dating Kim Seokjin, said to be this decade’s most desired leading man and who also happens to be your good friend, the one who’d helped you out a lot during your years in university. Yoongi used to be a little jealous then, something he never told you, and well, he guesses it’s meant to be with you and Seokjin now, a man he could probably never live up to. 
“Are you gonna be okay?” Geumjae breaks through his thoughts.
“Yeah. Why won’t I be?” Yoongi huffs, sinking back to his seat to watch the game that suddenly isn’t so interesting anymore. 
His question is left unanswered and his brother resumes his cheers, no doubt invested in this match that’s now tied. But Yoongi drifts in and out, his eyes following the players up and down the court then mindlessly landing on you. You’re seated in a relaxed manner, the opposite to how you used to watch his games. He sees you silently cheer for the Thunders, too, and you giggle at Taehyung when you scream louder than you intended, your hand covering your mouth as you lean on your friend and he laughs along. 
He could hear the sound of your laughter from across the gymnasium, as if the way the dulcet tone of your voice used to send shivers down his spine whenever you giggled in his ears was just yesterday. He shakes off the goosebumps he feels and tries to sit comfortably on the chair.
“Are you nervous?” Geumjae asks. “You’re awfully quiet.”
“Since when was I ever loud during a basketball game?” He shoots his brother an incredulous look. 
“You may not make a sound but your body does,” the older man points out. “I could feel you buzzing earlier and cheering in that Yoongi way of yours but now,” he eyes him up and down, “your legs are just bouncing. And you're biting your nails again.”
Yoongi catches himself. He forces his leg to be still and tucks his hand under it. It’s a tell he has, and he has no doubt that his brother has caught on. Still, he lies. “The game’s close. I want the Thunders to win.”
“Really? That’s what you’re going with?”
“Yes, now can we just focus on the game?” Yoongi chides, not wanting to confirm whatever his brother’s suspicions are. 
“Fine, but for the record, I know exactly why you’re nervous.”
“I don’t really care.”
Geumjae sighs as he watches his brother’s gaze go to you once more, unknowingly, perhaps, as Yoongi seems to shake himself off after every time he realizes that his eyes were locked on your direction. But he can’t blame the younger man. You entered his life and he fell, extremely hard, and letting you go was the most difficult thing he ever had to do. Yoongi doesn’t need to tell him though, but there’s enough of his younger brother’s broken pieces lying around for Geumjae to know that it was also something he regretted doing, and he wishes his brother was at least brave enough to admit all that.
The Thunders win by 5 points. It was nail-biting until the very end. It was Namjoon’s crucial offensive rebound and Jungkook’s 3-point shot that sealed the game for them, and Yoongi was present enough to witness those last few plays. He decides to enjoy this moment with his friends, knowing they’d be asking him about it later. If he’ll still go to the party. Somehow, seeing you again made him a little dizzy. It was still on the screen, but now he’s not sure he’ll know what to do when he sees you in person. 
He and his brother let the crowds go before heading out separately. Geumjae’s car is parked elsewhere, and Yoongi decides to head to the washroom and pace his walk to the parking lot. Hands on his pockets and eyes glued to the floor, he hears a gasp, and he releases one himself when he sees you, hiding behind one of the vending machines as a group of fans at the end of the hallways starts walking towards your direction, wondering aloud where you went. 
He sees the panicked look in your eyes and decides to stop the crowd before they come any closer. 
“She headed that way,” he announces, pointing to the right. “There’s an exit there. She probably left already.”
You hear the disappointed sighs, and much as you don’t want to let your fans down - you’re not one to deny them autographs - there have been too many of them this afternoon and you weren’t mentally prepared to accommodate each one of them. The footsteps disappear not long after and you let out a sigh of relief. That was close, but you didn’t expect Yoongi, of all people, to be the one to stir them away.
You turn to him, about to say your thanks, but somehow the words get stuck in your throat. You recall being a giddy mess the very first time you saw him, with nibbled lips and palpitating heart as you watched him shoot baskets and dribble the ball like no one’s business, and you’d been a goner since then. But he was a lot thinner during that time. His hair was cut short and his eyes had this sharp, confident gaze that usually intimidated people. You eventually saw how they softened only for you, though, but you’ll always remember that summer and how he had you wanting him at first glance. 
This man before you isn’t all that different. He still has the same sharp eyes, with his look penetrating right through your soul like he knows you and well, he does, which is also why he was quick to misdirect the crowd after he perhaps saw the look of worry on your face. His tiny nose is the same, so is his pale skin. But his hair is now long, pushed back in the middle as it softly reaches close to his shoulders. He’s a lot leaner; you can easily tell from what’s hiding behind his thin white shirt underneath his blue jacket. You recall him dressing mostly in monotone colors, so seeing him in something a little more striking is new. He’s gorgeous just like before, and you don’t really know why you expected that he wouldn’t render you speechless this time around.
“___,” he calls out. “Were they bothering you?”
“No, uh
” you stutter, hating yourself for suddenly being nervous. “There were just too many of them and they were getting quite close, I kind of panicked. Stupid, really. I should be used to it by now. More of them came and I just
”
“If they were invading your personal space then that’s not right,” he says, his tone so serious you mistake it for worry. “Did they touch you or anything?”
“Oh no! Nothing like that. I just got a bit overwhelmed.”
“Where’s Taehyung?” He asks, as you watch him walk to the vending machine where you’re hiding, tap his card, and then get the bottled water that falls out. He opens it and hands it to you as if he’d done this so many times before, and well, he actually has.
“He met up with a couple of friends,” you explain. “The crowd got to me right after and I kinda lost him, but I told him I’ll meet him outside, somewhere near where the players come out.”
“Hmm, okay,” Yoongi hums, looking away. 
He should’ve expected you to look way more beautiful up close but he tends to underestimate his ability to be entranced by you. He’s surprised he even got any word out, but the worry crept in the moment he saw you look a little winded and he just wanted to make sure you were alright. You’re a celebrity, after all, and the city’s ïżœïżœïżœPrincess,” as they claim. 
You look a little nervous though, and a part of him just wants to scold Taehyung for leaving you behind, seeing as neither of you looked like you had security with you earlier. But that shouldn’t be his responsibility anymore, he reminds himself. 
“Thanks for the water, by the way,” you speak up. “How much was it?”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“Thanks again,” you smile shyly. “So, uhm, do you know where the other exit is? I’m kind of lost.”
“Oh, uh
 the one close to where the players go out is there,” he cocks his head to the left, towards a hallway behind swinging doors. “I can uh, I can show you where.”
“Ah, that would be great. Did you park close there, too?”
No.
“Yeah,” he lies. “Let’s go before more people see you.”
He opens the door and walks after you. It doesn’t help that the hallway suddenly feels much smaller and closed off because now, Yoongi has to listen to your footsteps and nothing else, since neither one of you chooses to talk. 
What does he say to the woman he broke up with 6 years ago? Maybe he can say something about your recently concluded series. He thought it was really good. Is it weird to ask what your next project is? Perhaps. You probably can’t even tell him. How was it like being the leading lady this time? Fuck, he’s not a talk show host or anything like that. 
He sees the end of the hallway before his mind can come up with another stupid question, and he rushes to the door before you do, catching you by surprise. 
“Just wanted to make sure there’s no one to bother you,” he explains, as you exit the building with questioning eyes. 
“Oh, thanks,” you smile shyly again. 
He’s not used to it. He remembers the way your eyes used to gaze at him constantly, how your smile and laughter were all cheeky and flirty, how the tone of your voice was always so confident, so charming. He thinks that maybe like him, you’re just as surprised and unsure about seeing each other after so long. He doesn’t know what to make of things beyond that.
“Do you have someone to pick you up?” he asks, needing to prepare himself if, as a last resort, he’d need to drive you somewhere.
“Yeah, Tae and I were supposed to ride together but,” you pause, checking your phone for your best friend’s text message, “he rode off with his friends and said he’d meet me at Jungkook’s instead so I’m just waiting for the guys. There’s the—”
Party, Yoongi says in his head.
“___!” Jungkook’s loud voice cuts you off. He jogs up to you and puts an arm around your shoulders, unaware of the man in front of you who’s being blocked by a wall. “You ready to go? Tae said he went ahead.”
Yoongi makes his presence known with a low grunt, his eyes pacing from his friend to you. You both look a lot closer than he remembers, and Yoongi’s mind goes to that first time you all met, how Jungkook had announced during their team celebration that the “girl with the yellow scarf on her hair is so pretty” and that he’d wanted to ask you out. Of course, things turned out differently - you weren’t interested in the younger man. But that was years ago. Jungkook has had an impressive professional career and he lives in Seoul. Maybe things have changed for you.
You follow Yoongi’s eyes. Despite many people claiming that he’s difficult to read because of the default unconcerned, almost detached look he has for every situation, you think he’s actually pretty transparent. 
Or maybe that’s just you. You’ve spent enough time with him to know his sound of annoyance and the meaning of his body language. You’ve memorized that pretty face of his at one point that you can tell the slightest parting of his lips and the tiniest drop of his eyes, which could mean that he’s confused, sad, or disappointed. Maybe all.
“Oh, we’re not
” you exclaim, surprising yourself, to the amusement of Namjoon, who suddenly appears next to you. “I mean, Jungkook and I aren’t
 a thing.”
You promptly remove the man’s arm from your shoulder and try to decipher Yoongi’s look now. Is it relief? Does he believe you? Does he think it’s silly that you had to clarify that, which you’re wondering why you did?
“Okay,” Yoongi says. 
Perhaps you’re wrong. You can’t tell right now what he’s feeling.
“We just
 got to hanging out when I got drafted by the Thunders,” Jungkook now clarifies, which he quickly realizes is maybe making this awkward situation a lot worse. 
You’re Yoongi’s ex-girlfriend after all, and Jungkook had been the one to reach out to you when he moved to Seoul, but not once did he try to pursue you all these years. He respects his captain too much and cares for what you both had, which is why he maintained his friendship with you even after the breakup.  
“That’s nice to know,” Yoongi replies, his tone nonchalant like always.
He’s glad he can keep his cool that well, even if his heart was just about to explode at the thought of you possibly dating his friend. He doesn’t know why he cares, though, as he never really thought much about the so-called code that stated that exes were off-limits to friends. 
He’s just about to turn around when Namjoon calls out. “Min, you’re still going to the party, right?”
Yoongi looks at you, who promptly looks away. Up until 10 minutes ago, he was about 80% sure he would. He didn’t think that being in close proximity to you would make him remember all sorts of things, and that itself is enough for him to run for the hills and avoid you. He won’t claim he did his best to forget about you - he at least tried, and that still counts - but he didn’t expect he’d ever get a chance to be near you, much less talk to you and be in the same place as you. Again. 
But he looks at his friends’ eyes, both pairs unsure yet practically begging him to still go. He remembers these looks, and he swears it’s because he doesn’t want to let both of them down that he battles with the inner part of himself and decides to still go. It definitely doesn’t have anything to do with somehow finding out for how long you’re staying, and why you’re here in the first place. 
“Yeah. I’ll see you guys there,” he replies, turning around now and heading towards his car on the opposite side of the parking lot. 
You watch Yoongi walk away, unsure of why your heart is beating as fast as it is. It had been like that since you saw him after hiding from the fans, and even more so when you walked silently in the hallway to head outside. 
You knew you were gonna see him, maybe even at the party, but not in the way you did. And all your confidence at not being bothered or affected with seeing him again melts away. 
You weren’t prepared for how good he’d look, for how concerned he’d be over your safety, and for that hint of disappointment on his face at the thought of you being with Jungkook. Neither were you prepared for that incredibly tiny part of you that wants to know how he’s doing and if he’d managed to piece together the broken parts of himself and his dream that he so adamantly chose over you.
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You survive the car ride by glaring at Namjoon every time he starts teasing you about panicking over Yoongi thinking that you were dating Jungkook, while the latter curses as he drives, claiming he survived one of the scariest moments of his life. 
You arrive in Jungkook’s house in half an hour, a nice place he bought for himself because he said that Daegu will always be home for him. The sliding doors to the patio give it a spacious feel, and you see that a couple of his friends had already prepped the space, complete with beer kegs and beer pong tables, the way you remember they always used to party.      
The 3 of you spot Taehyung who greets you, and the 2 men next to you proceed to narrate what happened, to your best friend’s shock and amusement. You also fill all of them in with the first part of the story about Yoongi finding you as you hid away from the crowd.
“How
 symbolic,” Namjoon hums. “You meet at a basketball court in Daegu after a game while you were hiding from fans because you’re such a bigtime actress now. I mean, it’s quite ironic. The universe is out to tease you or something.”
You agree, it is. It’s times like this when you wish you didn’t believe in fate and destiny because doing so would just give you false hope that you and Yoongi may be meant for more than just those 2 years together. And you absolutely hate it because you can’t fall into that trap of thinking that you’re meant for a happy ending that includes him. That ship sailed a long time ago - 6 years and about 5 partners later.
But as Yoongi enters the house, his bowed head turning up to search the area before daintily tucking a strand of hair behind his ear, you start to think that maybe that ship decided to turn back around and sail towards you once again. He briefly meets your eyes before someone calls out to him, and you’re left to admire him from afar, cute button nose and impeccable side profile and all. 
Taehyung pulls you by the arm and whispers in your ear. “Okay, so what’s our plan?”
“What do you mean, our plan?” You ask, realizing you’ve lost Yoongi as you glance in the direction of where he was, no longer finding him there. “Plan for what?”
“Yoongi, obviously,” Taehyung rolls his eyes. “Do we avoid him, be civil, pretend you don’t think about him anymore, or act like the past 8 years didn’t happen and we don’t actually know him?”
“None of the above,” you groan. “What kinds of options are those?”
“Decent ones?”
“Nope. You’ve already had a lot to drink and I don’t trust you when you’re drunk.”
“Except you should. This is when I don’t hold back when it comes to you,” Taehyung answers.
“And you hold back otherwise?” You frown. 
“Just when it’s about him. It was tough for a long time. I know sometimes it still is.”
You don’t have the heart to disagree. This man has been your best friend for a decade and he knows how you are, knows which pains of yours you’re willing to talk about and which ones you’d rather hide away. Your acting skills may be good but you know that Taehyung can see behind all the smiles and the detachment and the effort to look okay, and whatever it is he’s thinking, there’s a good chance he might be right. You’ve just never been brave enough to admit them. 
The look of understanding you both share gets disrupted when cheers erupt in the middle of the living room, seeing that Seungkwan had just beaten Jungkook in beer pong. The pro player demands a rematch and the entire house cheers in agreement. Jungkook takes the next game but Seungkwan won’t back down. 
“Let’s do it in pairs,” he challenges. “I take Joon.”
“Fine,” Jungkook says, his game face on, knowing there’s one other person he knows could win this with him. “I take the Captain.”
Cheers erupt once more as people push Yoongi to the center where the rest of the guys are. He shakes his head, seemingly uninterested in partaking in tonight’s festivities but goes anyway after much coaxing from everyone. He then does his handshake with Jungkook to the younger man’s insistence, and you watch Yoongi’s soft, shy smile appear. 
And just like the very first time you saw that, you feel your heart thrum in excitement. There was always something special about it, and back then it was because he rarely did it, but he did it a lot when he was with you. It’s nice to see it during a moment like this - surrounded by his old friends while having fun with them. You’re glad he shows more of it now, and you wonder how many people fell harder for him because of it. 
You watch from the sideline as the Jungkook-Yoongi pair score 4 straight. Seungkwan complains that Namjoon isn’t making any shots, prompting the older man to claim that he’s way better at dunking than shooting tiny balls like they’re jumpers. They eventually lose after all the theatrics but it’s enough to get the guests going, as you find yourself teasing both men as well. 
You remember their house parties being this rowdy and this loud, given all the energy and testosterone that these athletes had so much of. That obviously hasn’t changed, and despite all of them having grown up, looking all mature and much more respectable, the naughtiness remains, especially once they’ve had too much to drink. 
It’s why you find yourself surrounded by a bunch of the guys, asking for a photo with you to show off to their friends and families. 
“I’m showing this to the guys at the office,” Seungkwan announces as he gets your approval over the selfie picture he took of you both. “They’re not gonna believe I went to college with an actress.”
“Uh, I didn’t go to college with you,” you laugh along with the others. “I studied in Seoul.”
“Then how the fuck do we know you?” He exclaims, no doubt drunk out of his mind at this point. You remember him having a short-term memory every time.
“He’s the Captain’s ex, dumbo!” Soon-young reminds him, another one of the younger guys who hasn’t drank as much but was never good at knowing what not to say. “Remember the summer before his final year? She was with us all the time.”
“Oh right. They were inseparable and looked so in love,” Seungkwan giggles, and at this point, the rest of the people just go with what he’s saying. 
Not you though, neither does Yoongi, and neither does Namjoon, who slaps the back of Seungkwan’s head to loud-whisper that the ex-couple in question is right there.
“Shit, did they hear me?” Seungkwan wonders out loud and looks around before sipping his beer. “I meant it though.”
He laughs drunkenly, so do many others. There’s really only a handful of you who aren’t intoxicated, but right now you wish you were. 
“Wait, they’re both here?” Seungkwan recovers, eyes now glassy. 
He gasps when his gaze turns to you and then Yoongi, and he puts his arm over your shoulder and slightly drags you to the right so he could put his arm over Yoongi, too.
“I found them!” Seungkwan squeals, pushing both of you to face him. “Shit, you still look good together.”
“Alright, dude, that’s enough,” Namjoon finally steps in, pulling the inebriated man away. “Sorry,” he turns to you. “Don’t mind anything he said.”
Too late, you want to say, but you release an awkward laugh instead. 
“They haven’t changed since college, huh,” Yoongi says, surprising you. “They still put us on the spot then leave us to deal with the aftermath,” he continues, watching as the group disperses to go drink and chat again. 
You turn towards him and sigh in relief over the small smile he has on. You swear the tension was so thick earlier that you could cut it with a knife, but Yoongi doesn’t seem bothered. He looks calm like he always does, and just like those first few times, you take your cue from him. You try to release the tension from your body and smile. 
“They should be banned from drinking when there are ex-lovers in the building,” you chuckle. “But I’m pretty sure he’ll be apologizing to you like crazy once he’s sober. Wish I could see that.”
“I can’t wait for that, too,” Yoongi hums. 
A wave of silence envelopes you both. The sounds of your friends seem like white noise now, and with the background music on and the man next to you just sipping his drink, it’s oddly comforting. 
You learned long ago that he has this amazing ability to do that - make people around them feel calm. There’s something so reassuring about him that remarks about your past don’t faze him, and now that’s rubbing off on you, as you feel the awkwardness slowly melt away.
You and Yoongi stand by the couch while the world around you continues. You’d stay in this bubble with him if it wasn’t so familiar, only because the familiarity scares you a little. You don’t want to know if anything else feels the same.
“I’m gonna look for Tae,” you say, breaking the silence. 
You only need to look to your left at the sound of someone hooting to find your best friend downing another cup of some concoction, and by the sound of his laugh, you know this is the one that will do it for him. This is his point of no return. Anything he does after is not meant for many people to see; he has an image to protect, after all.
“Alright, that’s my cue,” you say, walking towards him. 
You cup Taehyung’s face in your hands and tell him that the party’s over and you’ll take him home. He argues, but you remind him that he’s a celebrity and that he can’t have drunk pictures of him circulating online. His inebriated mind sort of gets it, and you take him in your arms and start looking around, trying to see which of the guys are the most stable one to drive.
“How are you going home?”
“Uh
” you turn to face Yoongi. “One of
 them? Jungkook, Wooz, Soon-young all offered.”
“And they’ve all had a lot to drink,” he replies.
“Who here hasn’t?” You chuckle, eyes still searching the room. You don’t want to ask your safest option, which is the man in front of you. You’re not quite sure how your heart can handle that. 
“Me,” he says so casually. “I just had one bottle.” 
You know what he means, even more when he goes to Taehyung’s side to help you assist your drunk best friend. Yoongi doesn’t say anything else though; he just stands there while waiting for your reply. This is about safety, you remind yourself, and it has nothing to do with suddenly wanting to be in his presence just a little longer.
“Okay,” you reply, knowing he knows what you mean, too.
“Okay.”
All three of you say goodbye to your friends, all of whom give you smug looks, passing up on the teasing now given Yoongi’s displeased face after someone remarks that “mom and dad are taking care of their kid again.” This isn’t a new scene for them, either. Taehyung just tends to have a lot of genuine fun when he’s with his friends; it’s something you relate with after being in the industry you’re in.
You and Yoongi help Taehyung in the backseat where you sit, with your best friend’s head securely on your lap because he’s now complaining of a migraine. Your designated driver starts the car shortly after he checks on both of you. 
“Neither of you took your cars?” He asks.
“Tae did but passed up on driving tonight,” you say. “I would’ve driven, had I known he won’t be able to control himself. I’m still waiting for my requested rental car.”
Yoongi merely hums and focuses on the road while you
 well, while you sort of focus on him. Your position behind the passenger seat allows you a view from the side - from how his fingers drum the steering wheel to how he nibbles his lips. His eyes are focused on the road but you can tell he’s focused on both of you, too, with the way he turns to the back whenever Taehyung makes some garbled sound or just to ask you if you’re okay. 
You watched him do this so many times before with you next to him, holding his hand and kissing his cheek at every stoplight. For someone who loves music, he never put the radio on when he drove you. He said it allowed him to focus on you, and that memory isn’t one that you really want to think of right now, especially since it’s silent in the car. You don’t know which ones you’d rather remember, though - the good ones or the bad. You suppose either would hurt regardless, and this wasn’t something that you prepared for. 
You make it to your best friend’s house as you and Yoongi assist him to the gate to Mrs. Kim’s shock. She scolds a barely-awake Taehyung and apologizes profusely to Yoongi, who says she’s happy to see him in their home once again. As Mr. Kim takes his son up to his room, Yoongi turns to you and asks if you need a ride home.
“I’m sleeping over,” you say in a panic. “Someone’s got to take care of his drunk ass.”
“Okay,” Yoongi says, briefly meeting your eyes before nodding towards his car. “I’ll go ahead. It was nice seeing you again, ___.”
They’re simple words that any old friend would tell another after seeing them in years, but somehow they hit you differently. This entire evening hasn’t been a dream or some made up scenario in your head where you meet the man you loved after so long. 
He’s here. With you. Looking at you in a way you’re very unfamiliar with - with a calmness in his eyes and a hint of care and acceptance, as if he’s glad you’re here but that he’s well aware of the years between you, of the years that passed by, of the years that changed you both. 
You don’t respond fast enough because before you know it, he’s turning around, ready to head out the door.
“It was nice seeing you, too, Yoongi,” you say softly. 
But he hears it, stops walking for a while, and then opens the door and walks out. 
You wonder if he’d said something the day you left, would you have stopped and turned around? Or would you have kept walking?  
But thinking about that won’t do you any good, so you turn away as well and head upstairs.
Outside, Yoongi steps on the gas, turns to the next corner, and then stops the car. He clasps his hands together so they’d stop shaking, and he lets himself breathe for the first time tonight. He’s kept his cool long enough, but after everything - the party, the teasing, the car ride - he doesn’t think he can hold the emotions in any longer, and he doesn’t even know what they are. 
Longing? Sadness? Regret? Is it the unspeakable feeling of fear at the thought of you dating one of his friends who might actually be good for you? Is it relief at the idea that letting you go was the best thing that he could’ve ever done for you? Is it confusion over wanting so badly to take you in his arms but not wanting to feel your touch, knowing it would remind him of everything he’s tried to forget? 
Yoongi lays his head on the headrest and takes a breath. You’re so beautiful, as if some light shines on you wherever you go. It’s probably the glow you emit; he’s told you that before but you always said he was just teasing. He sees it even more now. 
But it’s also the crinkle of your eyes when you smile that sweet smile of yours that makes things feel familiar, and because of that, uneasy. It’s that honey sound of your voice; he heard it as you laughed during the party and joked around with everyone. It’s that captivating look you have, the one that says you know something but you want to know more; he felt that look when he entered the house and as he drove you earlier. 
He wonders if you saw past him, past his nonchalance and calm demeanor. You were always so good at that - knowing there was more behind his passiveness, knowing how to get a reaction from him, knowing which buttons to push so he’d open up and let you in. 
He doesn’t know if he should be afraid that you still know how to do it, or if he should revel in it because he’s missed you, more than he could ever say and more than he’d ever care to admit. 
But beyond all that, he’s sure that one of his emotions is happiness. Every time you talked about work and being able to watch yourself on screen - he swears he didn’t eavesdrop but that he just happened to be there - there was that excitement that felt like the continuation from when you used to talk about your big dreams with him. 
You got what you wanted and you worked hard to get to where you are and he knows you’re proud of yourself and that’s all he’s ever wanted. Seeing that smile - he knows. Letting you go was the best thing he’s ever done for you.
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“What are you doing here?”
Taehyung’s hoarse voice forces your eyes off the ceiling onto your side where he’s currently hugging his pillow, messy hair and pouty lips on display. 
“Trying to get some rest after I saved your drunk ass last night,” you bitterly respond. “I got to you before any compromising photos or videos were taken. You’re welcome.”
“Hmm, thanks,” he groans. “But uh, why are you here? Didn’t you say you wanted proper rest in your house before seeing your family today?”
“Right, uh
 you see. Yoongi drove us here, and then he asked if I wanted a ride home but I kinda panicked and said I’m sleeping over so
 Here I am!” You laugh, unconvincingly. “My rental car’s on the way here. I’ll drive to my house and then go to my dad’s.”
“Ugh, you’re so dumb,” he says, sinking into his comforter. You gasp in response. “That was your chance to be alone with him but you didn’t take the offer. We both know you wanted to.”
“Tae, being drunk and not holding anything back doesn’t mean you can just assume things like that,” you respond, sitting up and frowning at him. “I didn’t want to be alone with him, that’s why I’m here!”
“Why didn’t you want to be alone with him?” He answers back.
“Uhm, why would I want to?” You ask incredulously. “Since when was getting in a car alone with an ex ever a good idea?”
“Why? You’re afraid you’d kiss him if you did?”
You scowl at your best friend. “I should’ve left you there drunk with possible penis drawings on your face.”
“Just being honest. It’s not like you’ve never done that with him before,” he shrugs. 
“I hate you.”
“I know. But you’ll love me later on. At least I’m still half asleep.”
You push him awake, the stress heightening now as the previous night plays in your head. 
“Tae! What happened to my hi, goodbye plan?!” You groan. “I was literally just supposed to say hi and then be civil, like, acknowledge his presence but not be affected by it. But then we had some small talk and he drove us home.”
“We all know it was a denial plan,” he huffs. “It was bound to fail.”
“Gee, thanks. You’re being incredibly helpful right now,” you frown again. 
“Fine,” he grumbles, sitting now. “You had small talk, he drove you here. How are those affecting you and why are you making it a big deal?”
“I’m not making it a big deal,” you point out. 
“You kinda are.”
“No, I’m not.”
“You are because that’s how things started before. And you’re afraid that one small misstep will cause you to fall for him all over again, fast and hard, because that’s how you are when it comes to him.”
“You’re hungover and tired so your judgment is impaired,” you say, crossing your arms. “You remember what happened after all that. I’ll be perpetually grateful that you never pushed me to talk about it unless I was drunk and couldn’t remember things but I was heartbroken, Tae. And then I was numb. It took a while before I started to feel again.”
“I know,” he says, taking you in his arms now as he holds you like a baby - a rare occurrence, as this often happens the other way around. “And I can never fault you for it because even if it was like that summer fling that only happened in the movies, I know you loved him, genuinely and intensely, and a love like that stays with you. But he’s got a good life here, ___, and you’ve got an amazing one in Seoul. You just have to remember why it didn’t work out in the first place and make sure you don’t fall into that trap again. Just
 acknowledge that. For your sake. And then do what you need to do so you don’t make the same mistakes again.”
Enveloped in his warmth, you take in your best friend’s words. He may still be hungover and may also be confused but his comfort never seizes, and it’s one of the reasons why you love him dearly. 
“So yeah, good on you I guess for not taking that ride with him. Maybe staying away and keeping your distance might be good,” he adds.
Your silence somehow alarms him, so he nudges you. “It’s a good idea, right?”
“I don’t know. Suddenly I feel like staying away and keeping my distance will let him know that it still affects me. He’ll always know me like that,” you sigh, hugging him tightly for more comfort. “And there’s this part of me that wants to show him that I’m fine, you know?  That even with everything that happened between us, I walked away from it knowing what I deserve, and that’s someone who’ll fight through life with me. He didn’t and that’s on him but he had his reasons, and looking back, maybe he was right. Maybe he had to let me go, and maybe - because I loved him genuinely and intensely - I want to show him that it wasn’t all in vain. And that I’m happy. Even without him.”
“You don’t need to prove anything to him, you know?”
Maybe I want to prove it to myself, you don’t say. There’s a stubbornness in you that doesn’t go away. 
“This isn’t about him, is it?” Taehyung levels his head with you. 
For someone hungover, he still knows you pretty well. 
You just sigh and fall back in his arms. He doesn’t push you. He just hugs you again until you both fall back in bed and he can comfortably curl his body all over you because it’s Taehyung and he likes to do this. 
“Just be careful, alright?” He pleads. 
“You know I also kinda don’t have a choice,” you reply. “It’s a small town and we’re bound to see each other. Jungkook and Namjoon have a game here again in a few weeks and that means another get together.”
“Yeah, but you know what I mean.”
You hum. “Promise me you’ll be by my side whatever happens?”
“Always, you stubborn woman. I’m the one person who’ll never leave you even if you push me away.”
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The lunch with your family is how you expect it to go - with your older sisters making some backhanded comments about your fame and how you’ve been “too busy” to even visit, and your father trying to dissolve the tension. He’s at least genuinely curious about how you’ve been, asking if you’re eating well and getting enough rest. Your stepmom raves about your drama series and shares that she cried during the finale.
“Why did he have to go back to his planet?” Garam’s 7-year old asks after your stepmom narrates what happened. 
“His time on earth was up,” you explain. “He finished his mission and he had to leave.”
“But why didn’t he stay if he was happy?” 
“Because he had a responsibility in his home,” you smile. “He wasn’t made for this world.”
“He didn’t have a choice, sweetie,” Garam adds after her daughter comments that it was sad. “That’s understandable. Some people leave because they’re no longer happy with those around them. Or because their dreams are more important than those they supposedly love. Isn’t that sadder?”
“It is. Don’t leave me, Mama,” the little one pouts.
“Oh sweetie, I never will. I don’t leave people that I love,” Garam responds, glancing at you to make a statement. 
You zone out after that, not wanting to engage with your sisters anymore. You play with their kids, though, who get excited when they see you on TV. You don’t want to treat them like you hold a grudge against them even if you do so with their mothers. Your sisters continue to do that with you - resent you when it’s your mom they’re really angry at for leaving your already unhappy family after she got her dream job in Paris. You were never angry though but you did sort of follow in her footsteps, and your sisters hated you even more because of that. 
“Are you staying for dinner?” Your father asks, the hope in his eyes hurting you. 
Things weren’t going well with your parents for a while, giving your mom more reason to leave, but you always wished that he had done more for you to feel loved in the home that started to become toxic after it fell apart, but you suppose he was just trying to heal his own broken heart after his wife left. It felt like your sisters weren’t going to forgive you when you decided to leave yourself, and he just let you walk away without making sure you knew he still loved you despite your decision. 
He’s moved on now, though, and happy with someone who prioritizes him and his needs. But too much time and distance can pull people apart - you can see them without the desire of being with them. That’s the reality with you and him now and there’s not much you can do about it. 
“No, I’ve got other plans,” you respond, glancing at your sisters who return your look with bitterness. “I’ll see you at grandpa’s tomorrow.”
You drive around for half an hour with no destination in mind. It’s nice to see how much this place has changed and discover which parts of it still feel the same. 
You pass by an antique shop - the antique shop,  a generations-old family-run store that used to be the hub of imported furniture that the townspeople once flocked to. It’s now a speciality store that still sells one-of-a-kind items but it also refurbishes old pieces. You see a poster on the window that’s promoting woodworking workshops. You won’t be surprised to find out whose idea that was.
A man briefly exits, and you stop near the front, wanting to just take it in. He’s got more gray hair now and walks a little slower but he looks just like you remembered - soft crinkled eyes, comforting smile, a look that you know all too well. You decide to enter, as you’re desperate for something - anything - that feels more like home than the one you just came from. 
“May I help you?” The man asks.
“A greeting and a hug would do,” you look up at him and smile.
“___?!” He gasps, walking outside the counter to get closer to you. “Is that really you, my dear?”
“Yes it is, Mr. Min,” you smile, returning the hug that you requested. “Just passing by my favorite antique shop in town. How are you doing?”
“Great! Business is stable and I’ve still got a lot of fight in me to continue,” he chuckles. “How about you? The big city treating you good?”
“It is,” you reply. “I think I’m doing quite okay there.”
“Ah, well it should be treating you amazingly. That’s what you deserve.”
You continue the conversation, with you asking about his latest projects and him, talking about his furniture and wood like his children, pride laced in his voice every time. He asks you about your latest series and if you’ve met his favorite actors and you indulge him. His laughter is music to your ears. You remember spending time here where he worked on his pieces while you talked about your favorite movies.
“Does my son know you’re here?” He asks after a beat of silence. 
“He does. I saw him last night. He looks well.”
“He does, doesn’t he? It took a while but he’s doing much better than before - smiling, joking around, helping me at the shop, talking about basketball again. It’s nice to see.”
The words hit you in ways you didn’t expect. Breaking up with Yoongi was tough to get over. Those last few months had been incredibly hard and so many times you thought that maybe if you’d been more patient, maybe things would’ve turned out differently. 
But you remember how during those last days with him, he’d lost the glimmer in his eyes and the softness of his smile. Not even you could bring those back. His passion for things just dwindled; he stopped wanting more, stopped wanting you, stopped thinking that things could still work out for him after what he suffered through. 
You’d kept in touch with Namjoon and Jungkook at their insistence, and they’d been the one to update you on how Yoongi was doing. Not a lot of details but just general things like the jobs he took and that he was keeping himself busy and that he was trying to get back on the court. It wasn’t with unpleasant stories, though - you learned about his new girlfriend from them, and that he didn’t play basketball for awhile, and that during the toughest days, he considered giving it up altogether. 
You knew he’d done well. You learned that from the guys, too. But hearing it from his father is different; you can’t imagine how it must’ve been like for Mr. Min to see his son start to change from what he used to be. But you know that as the good father that he is, he made sure that Yoongi knew he wasn’t alone. 
“And that’s good to hear,” you say. “Yoongi deserves all the happiness this world can give. I’m glad that he’s found his joy in basketball again it seems. And that he found it here.”
“He has, but I guess something will always be missing. He’s a lot better but he’s not the same. A parent would know, you know? The flame doesn’t shine as bright,” Mr. Min answers, the tinge of sadness in his eyes hurting you a little. 
But you just nod. His words seem to mean more but you don’t want to know what it is. 
“Dad, what did you want me to look at?”
Yoongi’s voice echoes in the shop and you can’t help but turn to him who’s just entered and looks as shocked as his father was earlier. 
You have a soft smile on, and Mr. Min knows not to intervene. 
“Oh, nothing,” he says, thinking that the new wood he acquired could wait. “Just watch over the counter for me while I check something inside, alright Son?”
He doesn’t let the younger man answer and just heads to the back, leaving you and Yoongi alone. He walks closer but keeps his distance. It’s enough for you to appreciate the softness of his face, though. His presence had always been reassuring; you see him twice and you’ve felt more comfort with him than you have in months. You don’t know how he does it, but that shouldn’t surprise you anymore. This isn’t the first time anyway. 
“Is Taehyung alright?” He breaks the silence. 
“Recovering, but more from his parents giving him shit for drinking too much,” you chuckle. “He got an earful and Mrs. Kim said she won’t let him in the house next time he gets that drunk. He’s doing chores as punishment.”
“Ah, well it’s been a while. It was nice to spend time with everyone again.”
“It was,” you smile now. 
“And you? Are you okay?” He asks, sincerity laced in his low voice.
“Yeah, of course.”
It’s the hesitant nod and the way your eyes look at anything but him, and he knows that whatever happened after last night is something you want to forget or seek comfort for. So he asks.
“So what made you come here? To the shop, I mean.”
“I was driving around. It didn’t register to me right away that I was in the area,” you respond. “And this place was always so calming for me, you know? The smell of wood, your dad’s stories
” 
You. 
“So I thought I’d come in”, you continue. “He hasn’t changed. It’s nice to see him.”
Yoongi always wondered what parts of you remained the same and which parts didn’t. 
Perhaps the playfulness tempered a bit. You seem a little more anxious than he remembers, too. There’s this sophistication about you that was always too good for this small town, and he sees that even more now. Your smile is still soft but it isn’t as bright. He won’t deny that it still makes his heart race, though. 
You have a habit of going somewhere familiar to seek comfort. You always looked for it in places, he noticed - in that dingy convenience store near your school, in your town’s secondhand bookstore even if you don’t like reading, in the Opera House where you and your mom used to go to. Yoongi learns now that that hasn’t changed at all. You’re in his dad’s store, a place you always wanted to go to after spending time with your family, and he supposes that’s where you came from.
He doesn’t know if he’s still someone you find comfort in and he doesn’t know if you even want to spend time with him after all these years, but he doesn’t have the heart to just let you walk out of here not knowing if you’re truly okay. 
He hated leaving you alone then when things weren’t good. You didn’t always want to talk but you said once that just hearing him breathing on the other end of the phone or just having his hand over yours made you feel better. He may not be the right person now but he’s still someone, and that’s always better than no one.
You eye the door, ready to leave, but his call of your name prompts you to look back at him.
“Do you have somewhere to be?” He asks.
“No, not really,” you reply. 
“Would you like to grab some coffee?”
The words are familiar. You hate that you remember everything about it.
“Just coffee?” You ask, almost teasingly.
He chuckles softly and meets your eyes, and somehow a part of you thinks that you shouldn’t do this. But you’re glad he asked in the first place.
“Yes, ___. Just coffee.”
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Series Masterlist
Permanent Taglist: @sherlynxx​ @di0rgguk​ @thequeen-kat​ @fan-ati--c  @cravingforhotchocolate​ @adoraminie​ @helenazbmrskai @weasleyswizarding-wheezes​ @preciouschimine @gukssunshine​ @nch327​ @kookxin​ @petuliii​ @yoursthv​ @libra04​ @fancycollectormoon​ @twixxxpie​ @ignoretheskies @ohmydarlin-g​​ @bids97​​ @minyoongiboongi​​ @main-bangtansmauyeondan​​ @bora-bae7 @investedreader @petalsofink​​ @jvngkooker
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vintagelacerosette · 3 months ago
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Tag game đŸ©·đŸŽ€
Hosted by the wonderful Jess @jrooc
Sorry for the lateness!! I was tagged by these twinkling starlights Kaka @stocious Dosho @doshiart Kat @mybrainismelted Pie @gallapiech Ice @spookygingerr Michelle @mmmichyyy Willow @ian-galagher Jen @wehangout Georgia @iansw0rld Cyn @ms-moonlight-inn Evie @ energievie Gigi @guinguin1984 Becki @francesroserecs Michelle @michellemisfit
Thaaankss đŸ„°
Name and A03 handle:
Shermyn/Myn & Dynastyria (no written works yet!💕)
Current Location:
On the lounge couch
Favourite picrew (don’t have one? you can skip this or do this one)?
So many to choose from!!!
Picrew 1 (I am obsessed with cardcaptors) , Picrew 2 (Willow made of usss & I treasure itttt 😍) Picrew 3 & Picrew 4 (bc who doesn't love a good bread bowl)
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What’s one thing you want in a picrew?
I think more body size inclusively đŸ™ŒđŸ»
Favourite thing you’ve created (or seen created) for the fandom?
Tie between Molly's draw this in your style/Gallacrafts & 2024 gallavich valentine's!
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Why is it your favourite?
It's the first time a drawing really looked how I thought it did in my head & I impressed myself. Also, I'm obssessed with the pastels in the gallavalentine. đŸ©·đŸ©”đŸ’œ
Did it come easily or was it hard to create? 
Hard bc I find body poses hard, then I start to procrastinate bc of that, but then I've got the deadline so it makes me stressed haha
Last ao3 fic you commented on?
from way up there (you and I, you and I) by the amazing @sam-loves-seb It was the cutest I couldn't even!!!
Biggest WIP heartache you’ve ever experienced? 
Where the Feigned Wind Falls by the very talented & missed Jenna @ianrightsonly
Thank you for sharing your story & I hope one day you'll come back đŸ„°
Favourite trope or head canon you like included in a fanfic?
Ohhh gotta be lust at first sight, then we fuck our way into true tender feelings!! I'm a sucker for it!! Notable writers of this are Jane @captainjowl & Kay @goodkwuestion & they are so damn good at it
Least favourite?
I haven't seen with gallavich thankfully but turning one character in a gay ship into the opposite gender to make them het!!
Secret or surprising kink or trope?
Omg it's gotta be uniform kink bc of Ray @whatthebodygraspsnot Kinktober 2022. It awoke something in me & I was like I finally get it ahaha
Describe how you feel after you’ve created something new?
I feel relief & feeling proud. Then I stress about when's a good time to post for most of ya'll to see bc of timezones 😅
Top hype man you have that always helps you get across the finish line:
My loves Benja @svltburn & Vey @look-i-love-u
I run to Ben in my art WIP bc like a kid showing art to an adult & Vey's given me amazing advice with writing that sparked inspiration đŸ„°
I'm in the headspace of desperately telling ppl about my fic ideas & wanting it to be a surprise so idk i may reach out for more hype men haha
It’s been a bad day, you turn to the fandom and you _____
Like Evie I mass reblog fandom works to spread love đŸ©·
I'm tagging these sparkling rainbow darlings if they wanna play & for anyone else consider yourself tagged 🌈
@ burninface @deedala @jademickian @sgtmickeyslaughter
@darthvaders-wife @matt404b @gallavichsbitch
@deathclassic @look-i-love-u @celestialmickey
@takeyourpillsbitchh @sickness-health-all-that-shit
@whaticameherefor @heymrspatel @gallawitchxx
@psychicskulldamage @sleepyfacetoughguy @doodlevich
@awa444 @suzy-queued @crossmydna @iandarling
@y0itsbri @michellemisfit @mikhailoisbaby @samantitheos
@pookiebearmick @reganmian @firecrxtch
@howlinchickhowl
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virtual-winter · 7 days ago
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It's been 10 years since I first watched Frozen!đŸŒ»â„ïžâ›ïžâ˜ƒïžđŸŠŒ
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(Swedish DVD-copy of Frozen)
November 20th, 2014. It seems like forever ago. I remember watching this movie through my desktop ASUS PC (remember when computers used to have actual DVD-drives?) on a by today's standards pretty crappy Philips monitor. It didn't matter. The movie was like nothing else I had seen before. Even though I don't even have a sibling and can't fully relate to the conflict, Anna and Elsa's adventure is IMO one of the best stories ever told💕
I was 22 back then. A young man and totally in love with this Disney movie. Now I'm 32 and it continues to be among my favourite movies of all time. Even now, ten years later, I still live and breathe Frozen every day! It is a part of who I became and it is the way I wish to remain 😄
I have become a devoted fan of all things Frozen and I'm trying my best to be a part-time Frozen-analyst, mapmaker, worldbuilder and collector. I'm also known for using too many emotes and exclamation marks!
Below, I have tried to summarise some important and meaningful keepsakes and events from the past ten years. I hope you enjoy scrolling!✹✹✹
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I believe this was the first ever Frozen-related pic that I saved (it's the oldest in my album) (April 2015)
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I was equally in love with the OUAT Frozen arc and no one can tell me Georgina and Elizabeth were anything but perfect for their roles (April 2015)
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đŸ„čđŸ„čđŸ„č
(March 2015)
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In just a couple of years we saw the franchise grow (did anyone else prefer the original logo for the musical?) (February 2016)
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The official announcement we'd all been waiting for (April 2017)
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The architect in me loved the castle! (2017)
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I mean, who could ever forget this moment? (December 2018)
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AJHFSJASJFKAGKJFGSKFDSGSJF!?!?!?!?!?!? (February 2019)
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What are those????? (February 2019)
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My first piece of "big" Frozen merch (April 2019)
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I made a custom calendar just to count down the remaining days to Frozen II (I also avoided spoilers for the last 6 1/2 months) (December 2019)
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đŸ„čđŸ„°đŸ˜­
(December 2019)
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Perfectly balanced, as it should be (February 2020)
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Me collecting stuff! (February 2020)
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Me going crazy saving as much Frozen content as possible 😅 (August 2020)
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I joined r/Frozen (June 2021)
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I started my deep-dive into Arendelle's geography in 2021 which ultimately lead to "An odyssey through Frozen geography", the first of many fandom projects! (July 2021)
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Together with a group of equally dedicated Frozen nerds fans, I helped building the @arendelle-archives server and later tumblr-blog! (2021)
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Collecting more things! (October 2021)
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A Frozen comic writer responded to my reddit post?đŸ˜Č(December 2021)
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I started developing ideas for a Frozen fanfic (2022)
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Frozen III-announcement! Finally! (February 2023)
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My Norway-trip of 2023. Without a doubt one of the most beautiful destinations on Earth and a must-go for anyone who wants to visit the real Arendelle!!! (July 2023)
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I continue to delve into more map-related stuff in Wonderdraft (May 2024)
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Together with the rest of the wonderful folks over at @frozen10fanzine, I helped create and design a fanzine summarising the memories of Frozen fans from the past decade! (July 2024)
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A slice of my current Frozen collection! Some figures were very kindly donated to me by @yumeka-sxf 🙌 (July 2024)
And lastly, from today: the first snow of the seasonâ„ïžđŸ©”
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If you made it this far, thank you for scrolling😅
Finally, a little shout-out to friends and acquaintances I've made through the likes of reddit, discord and tumblr in the past few years:
@bigfrozenfan @yumeka-sxf @greatqueenanna @queenritaofarendelle @saiten-gefroren @snowflaketale12 @cloudberriesforaqueen @theartoffrozen @secretsofthestorymakers
A big thank you also to the whole @arendelle-archives and @frozen10fanzine - teams! Y'all continue to inspire me!
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noisynaia · 2 years ago
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Magnetic Fields
My work for the lovely @pedrostories Secret Santa event 2022 🎁 @queenofthefaceless I hope you enjoy this, it was so fun to write! 💕
pairing: Din Djarin x afab!reader 
word count: 7.2k 
note: Explicit. (18+) The Razor Crest lives, and the helmet comes off. Bounty hunter reader. Canon-compliant injuries. Enemies to lovers (lovers to enemies to enemies with benefits to lovers). Mutual pining. Unprotected P in V (with use of contraception). Slow burn. No use of (y/n). The reader uses she/her pronouns. This has not been beta-read and English is not my native language. December has been more stressful for me than I thought it would so I haven't even had time to proofread this, so It might be pretty messy, but regardless, happy holidays ya'll! ♄ Crossposted on ao3
Smut right under the cut.
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You had never, not even in your wildest fantasy, thought you would do this with him again. It is, of course, very different this time around. No clumsy hands or nervous laughs as you shyly explore each other’s bodies, no eager kisses shared in the pitch-black darkness, for you to wonder what he looks like under the heavy helmet. No, this time around it’s rougher. 
Your knees are being pushed deeper into the hard mattress of the bunk with each frantic thrust from the Mandalorian behind you. Your ass is in the air and your face is buried in the pillow that smells so overwhelmingly of him. His armour normally conceals it, just like how it conceals so much else of him, but the sheets reveal his secret. His scent is rich and musky with a certain freshness that is reminiscent of pine, and it’s just like you remembered it. 
The angle of which he’s railing his cock into you is perfect, every strong thrust hitting that spongey magic-spot inside you, that is making your eyes teary and have you whine with pleasure. You are dripping wet and the adrenaline that still pounds through your body is making everything feel a hundred times more intense. You do fear that you’re going to regret this in the morning, but right now you simply don’t care. After two weeks of being cooped up in the cramped ship with the Mandalorian and his foundling, too scared to seek your own release out of fear of being heard, this is exactly what you have been desperate for. A part of you is aware that you have missed it, missed him, but you don’t let that part of you be heard right now. This is a transaction with mutual benefits, nothing more. The two of you fucking the adrenaline and frustration out of your systems and then you’ll go back to ignore each other as much as possible in the morning. But damn if his body isn’t heaven
 
Two weeks earlier
  
You take one last glance around the room, making sure that you have not forgotten anything, not that you have many items left that could have been left behind
 Your ship is gone and with it most of your belongings. The Silver Lining had gotten wrecked to scraps on your last mission and had been completely irreparable. That ship had been your everything and with the loss of it had come the loss of your home, along with most of your belongings, your livelihood and your whole identity. The journey back to Nevarro had been long and dreadful, the bus pods slow and uncomfortable, but you had finally arrived about a week ago and had informed Karga of your situation. 
He had given you his condolences about your ship and told you that he would try and see if he could do something for you. You appreciate this, but had also expected him to do something for you, after having worked for him for so many years. He had asked if you would be willing to team up with another member of the guild until you have collected enough credits to get a new ship, if he was able to find a willing partner for you.
You had said yes to this proposal, it would not be the first time you partnered up with a fellow bounty hunter, even though you haven’t done it for more than a single hunt or two at a time, not since your beginner days with him... But you’re in a compromised situation and your options are limited. 
You have stayed at the dingy inn since you came back to Nevarro, sleeping most of the days away and spending the nights drowning your sorrows about losing your beloved ship with too much Spotchka. But you had been contacted by Karga last night, he had found a hunter that is willing to partner up with you until you are able to get a new ship. Your best guess is Klian, the two of you have developed a sort of friendship over the years, mostly after you have learned to turn a deaf ear to his flirtatiousness.
You check out of your room before heading to the Cantina where Karga resides. It’s a short walk and you’re soon stepping through the door to the busy establishment. You walk over to the area where you always can find Karga, ignoring the annoying comments from the drunk Cantina goers. 
You look up when you reach Karga’s area, and the sight that meets you makes your stomach drop. There in the dim Cantina is the last person you would ever think to have agreed to team up with you, but there he sits at Karga’s table, in all of his beskar-clad glory, Mando
 
You don’t know much about what the Mandalorian has been up to the last several years, you’ve actually only seen him a handful of times in the decade that has passed since your fallout. You had dropped trying to talk with him the first time you saw him again after he had left you, he had been so standoffish and cold. You have no idea how Karga has convinced him, of all people, to take you onboard. 
You are still standing a few metres from the table, too surprised to say anything, the two men staring up at you from their seats at the table. Karga with an almost humorous expression, Mando not giving any emotions away do to the helmet  
“Please take a seat.” Karga finally breaks the silence. Gesturing to the empty chair opposite from Mando.   
You reluctantly sit down, making an effort to not meet the visor of the Mandalorians helmet, instead shooting Karga a confused and not very friendly look.
You risk a single glance over at Mando and that is when you notice a little green creature sticking its head up from the seat next to the Mandalorian. Has he got himself some sort of pet? You have never seen a creature like it before and you are staring at it as it gurgles happily at you. It takes you completely by surprise. The whole situation is so weird and your face is so contracted with confusion by it that it could be mistaken for disgust.
“I’d appreciate if you’d stop bothering my child.”
His child..?! Since when has he got a child? And what the hell does he mean by bothering

You stare at Mando for about three seconds before you explode.
“Fuck you, Mando!” You hiss as you stand up, not offering another word as you and swing your bag over your shoulder and storm out of the cantina. There is no way you’re going to partner up with that asshole. Fuck this, fuck Karga and fuck Mando!
—
Din is a selfish man, selfish and weak, at least when it comes to you, maybe he should have let you leave, especially after having ignored you for so many years, undoubtedly hurting you badly by it. Din should let you make the choice of rejecting his offer, even if it’s going to hurt him, but he instead passes Grogu to Greef and stands up to follow you out of the Cantina. He is selfish after all.
Seeing you and Grogu in the same room had been too much for him, the only two people he has truly loved in his adult life were overwhelmed. His heart had begun to yearn. He had snapped at you, not knowing what to do with his emotions and he hates himself for it, you don’t deserve that, you have not deserved any of the shit he has put you through.   
He has been avoiding you the best he could in all these years. He has been making a habit of checking the spaceport on Nevarro for The Silver Lining, every time he docks there. Usually finding some sort of excuse to wait till you have taken off to go collect his pay and new bounties from Karga on the occasions you are on the planet at the same times as him. It has, however, not been possible to completely avoid you through the years, he usually opt for ignoring you on the occasions that he finds himself in your proximity. Din hates himself for it, the hurt in your eyes makes him feel sick from shame. He is not proud of how he broke things off with you all those years ago, but he had no choice, or at least he had felt like it.
Din had first met you when you both were young, only a year or two after he had become a member of the guild, and you had just left your home-world of Corellia, joining the guild had been tough for you, but you were a skilled hunter and an astounding pilot, but you had had a hard time being taken serious as a young woman in this line of work. It had not taken long for the two of you to form an alliance, you were the two newest members of the guild and the youngest, teaming up had seemed like a good idea. It had not taken long for the young Din to become completely captivated by you. You were beautiful, smart and so very kind and he had soon developed a huge crush on you. 
He had been over the moon when you had seemed to reciprocate his feelings, it had been a sweet but intense romance, like young love often is. You had bewitched him entirely, and the realisation of just how deeply he began to feel about you had frightened him. He had almost taken off his helmet in front of you. He had gotten more distant after that. You had asked him one night if anything was wrong, if you had done anything to upset him. It had broken Din’s heart to hear you sound so unsure and hurt. He had come up with some lame excuse, telling you that it was nothing. He’s a Mandalorian, he could never give you what you deserved. He does not have the capacity to give you that and he could not break his creed. 
He knows that he had hurt you, even though it was the last thing in the galaxy he had wanted to do, but he truly had felt like he hadn’t had a choice, he would not have been able to keep his creed if he had stayed with you. He had left you on Navarro, taken off in The Crest in the middle of the night without even saying goodbye. 
But now his creed has been broken
 When he heard what had happened to your ship and that Karga was looking for someone to take you in he just couldn’t help himself, the tiny chance to get you back in his life had been too tempting. 
—
You stomp out of the Cantina, your ears are ringing with anger, but you don’t get far before you feel a big hand grasping your wrist stopping you in your tracks. It had been so long since he last touched you, but you know it’s him. A wave of emotions and memories sweeps through your body by his touch.
“Where are you going?” He asks as he spins you around to face him, his grip on your wrist is gentle. 
The softness he speaks with is throwing you off, you don’t know where to look, feeling too many, too contradicting, emotions at once. You hate him, but maker, how you have missed him too. 
“Away.” You huff, and he let go of your wrist. 
“Okay.” Is all he says, and it makes you want to scream. Why the fuck is he here, why does he suddenly want you to be around agin?! 
“Won’t you at least come in and talk before you leave? You don’t have to talk to me, but at least have a word with Karga.” 
“Fine.” You let out an angry huff through your nose, hating how sensible he sounds.
You step back into the cantina where Karga is sitting with the little green critter, who does look way more like a baby now that you get a better look at him. You hate the whole situation, but you’re also very desperate and after a short talk with Karga you give in even though it’s gonna be tense. Mando had been your first love after all and, as sad as it might be, the only man you’ve ever truly loved and he has really hurt you in the past
  
You get up from the table for the second time this evening when everything is settled. Mando is holding the pucks of the bounties you and him have been given, twice as many as you normally would have been given.  
“Why did you even say yes to this?” You finally ask Mando on the walk to the spaceport. 
Mando is quiet for a moment and you have begun to think that he is ignoring you again, but then he finally speaks. Crossing his arms over his chest plate and
“I owe Karga.” He simply states, not telling you the truth, that it actually is Kargo who owes him. That he had asked Karga to be the one to take you in. Din is after all a selfish man.  
“For what?” 
“That’s none of your business.” His words are harsh but all the bite is lost from his voice, he just sounds tired now.  
“Well, sorry I asked!” You scoff.
And the tense silence is back. The child is completely unaffected by the strained atmosphere, happy and curious to have gotten a new companion in you. You are angry and confused by the situation you have landed in, but that isn’t the child’s fault and you offer him a weak smile when he coos up at you as you reach the lot where The Crest is docked. 
“He’s my foundling by the way.” Mando tells you, nodding his helmet towards the little green kid. “His name is Grogu
”
You nod at the information, as Mando lowers the ramp, pushing past him the second the ramp has hit the ground, stomping into the ship. It’s many years since you last have been onboard, but you still remember the layout of The Crest and you stomp towards the tiny spare room. You are almost sure that it is where you’re going to stay and if you’re wrong you simply don’t care, you need to be alone behind a closed door for a second. Luckily it seems like you were right, a spare bunk is set up with clean sheets and a little cabin with empty shelves to your few remaining belongings. You let out a snort as the heavy metal door closes behind you. Mando making a room ready for you in his ship is an absurd mental image.     
“I’m going to get us off-world. We’re gonna hit the hyperspace route soon, you’ll have to come up in the cockpit for the jump.” His voice is sounding from the other side of the durasteel door. 
You let out a sigh as you let the bag slip from your shoulder and let it land on the floor with a thud.  
You’re seated in the copilot chair ten minutes later. Mando is in the pilot seat getting The Razor Crest ready for the hyperspace jump. Mando’s foundling in your lap due to lack of other seats.  
The eerie silence between you is suffocating so you focus your attention on the baby instead. Bouncing his little body on your knee which makes him gurgle with laughter, he really is a cute kid, his big bright eyes are pulling on your heart strings. You are distracted by Grogu when you realise Mando is staring at you from his seat in the pilot chair, but he looks back to the control panel as soon as you meet his gaze. What is his problem?! Does he have to micromanage your every move

“What?” You snap irritated. 
“Nothing.” He says with a light shake of his head, staring out on the stars that rushes past you. 
Better be nothing, you think as you sulk into the seat. Passing the baby to him the second the jump is over and retreating back to the little room. 
The next days are tense, to put it mildly. You avoid Mando as much as possible and ignore him when you can’t avoid him, but you pull yourself together when you’re getting close to the planet of your first bounty. Biting the bullet and approaching Mando to talk about strategy, and it goes better than you had feared.
It is like the two of you agree on a silent truce when it comes to your hunts and it pays off. As much as you might hate each other on the ship, you are a good team in the field. 
Two weeks goes by like this. You are on the way to the last planet you have left before you have to go back to Nevarro and pick up new pucks and deliver the bounties. This hunt is the one you have been dreading, it is by far the most tricky one, and you have a feeling that both the bounty and the swamp planet is gonna be giving you and Mando a run for your money. And, oh boy, were you right
 
You are tired and frustrated. The humid air is feeling sweltering, and it’s making your shirt stick to your sweaty back. The fog is laying thick over the swampy landscape. You knew that this was going to be a more elaborate hunt than your previous ones, but it has taken you even longer to hunt the bounty down than you had anticipated. Despite your frustrations with Mando you have to admit, he is a damn talented hunter. You can’t help but be a little in awe when you watch him work. 
The impressive shine to his new armour, he looks so broad and strong in it. You had thought that he had looked good back when you first met him, all those years ago. The armour he wore back then was a little more crude, he had not walked with the same amount of authority as now, but you had both been young, both of you had recently left your respective homes to join the guild. You had been completely captivated by him. Kriff, you had even thought that you had loved him back then, thought that he might have loved you. He had been your first
 He was a skilled and lethal hunter back then, but he had at the same time been more soft, it was before he had become battle hardened.  
He has, over the years, grown into the confident man and hunter he is today. The bond you had with him in your youth had been broken, completely torn to shreds, but you’re afraid that the intense attractiveness you felt for him is once again in full bloom. It annoys you, he shouldn’t have that power over you anymore, not after how he left things, but seeing him in action is so kiffin hot. The way he skillfully tracks his prey, the broadness of his shoulders and the thickness of his thighs is driving you wild. The satchel with little Grogu in it that is hung over his torso is throwing the picture of a lethal hunter off a bit, a weird contrast to Mando’s bruteness. But seeing him with his little son only makes him more attractive somehow.        
You don’t like that the kid is with you on hunts, every instinct in your body screams against. You are no expert on babies, but bringing them into dangerous situations feels like a big no-no, but it’s not like you have any other options. 
The hunt is long and tiresome and it’s late when you finally get back to The Crest. Grogu has fallen asleep, the satchel in which he lays is now hanging over your shoulder. The bounty is a giant of a man so you had to let Mando take care of him and instead be the one to carry Grogu. 
“I’ll put Grogu to bed.” You announce.
 Mando is struggling getting the bounty’s limp body carried into the ship and into the carbonite chamber before he gains consciousness again. The hunt is still close enough for the two of you to be civil with each other. You have never put Grogu to bed before, but Mando’s hands are full and the little one needs to be put down. Mando is rarely leaving him out of sight so you don’t spend a whole lot of time with the babe as you actually want to. And as much as you try to not get attached you’ve already fallen hard and fast for the little one. You still haven’t fully comprehended that Mando has a son now, you would never have imagined him as a parent before, but he seems to be doing a good job, and there is no doubt that he loves his little foundling. 
Grogu opens his eyes as you lift him over in his pod, muttering a tired sigh before falling back to sleep. You tuck him into his soft blanket and before you even register what you’re doing you're leaning in to press a gentle kiss to the top of his little fussy head. You step out of the little alcove in the hold in which Grogu’s pod is located and get shocked as you almost butt heads with Mando as you turn around. 
“Sorry
” He mutters. “Did Grogu make any trouble?” He asks, voice softer than you have heard it in a long time. 
“No, he was great, no trouble at all.” You shake your head. “He’s a good kid.” You can’t help but add. 
Mando just nods at this. A little silence settles between you. This is the closest you have been to him since you got on The Crest two weeks ago and the horrifying realisation of just how attractive you still find him is settling in. You are still feeling worked up from the mission and he is standing right there, visor trained directly on you.
“I just wanted to ask if you’re okay with waiting to take off to Nevarro till tomorrow?” He finally breaks the silence.
“Yeah, that’s fine by me.” You answer, you had not expected that you would take off tonight anyway. Mando nods but he still doesn't leave, you shuffle your feet a little. Does he feel the tension too? 
Mando takes a shaky breath before adding. “You did good today, It’s
 Nice to work with such a skillful hunter again.”  
A compliment..? You had not expected that! You open your mouth to thank him or maybe shrug it off but instead
 
“Do you wan’t to fuck me?”
The dread is washing over you the second the words have left your mouth, the kriff did you just say?! Of course he doesn’t want to do that. Dank farrik, are you really this horny.  
“It’s not going to mean anything.” You quickly add, knowing he doesn’t want it to mean anything. “And I have an implant, so
” 
“Do you want that?” He asks. 
“Yeah, I do.” You confess, there is no take back of your words, so no reason to shy away from it now.  
That is all it takes, his arms coming around your waist, hands grabbing your thighs as he picks you up, carrying you to his room. And, kriff, it’s hot. You feel your stomach clench and a convolution running through your cunt.   
He is removing his armour in a frantic rush, throwing the pieces on the bunk to not let the sound of beskar hitting durasteel floor wake Grogu in the hold. Shoulder armour, thighs panels, wrist gauntlets, chest plate, all gets removed until Mando stands in front of you in only his flight suit and helmet. You’re pulling at your own clothes, stripping down to your underwear. A groan escapes through the modulator of Mando’s helmet by the sight of you.
“You’re still sure you want this..?” He asks, voice deep and husky through the modulator, you can see the hard bulge through the fabric of his flight suit, and kriff, you have never needed anything so badly.
“Yes, Mando I want this.”
“How do you want it?” He asks, stepping close to you gripping your hips with his now ungloved hands, hands you have missed so badly. 
“On my knees, I want you to take me from behind and please don’t be gentle.” 
He executes your request to perfection, fucking you so well and hard that you have to bite down on his pillows to drown out your screams. He had been good back then, always so attentive, making sure you always reached your peak and felt good, but he had also been young and inexperienced, just like you had been. The both of you have grown up, there is nothing inexperienced or soft about what the two of you are doing now.     
The feeling of Mando’s cock filling you is so amazing it has tears pricking at the corner of your eyes. You are so worked up, the adrenalin from the hunt still running through your veins. The angle he’s hitting you with is perfection. You know that this is only sex, you are not like you had been back then, the two of you fucking the adrenaline out of your systems and nothing more. 
Mando groans behind you, hissing filthy praise about how tight you are and how well you take his cock. His grip on your hips tightens as he pushes you back on himself everytime he thrusts into you. 
“Dank farrik, so tight
” He hiss through the modulator of his helmet. “So, kriffin, tight around me.” 
“Fuck, Mando don’t stop! Don’t you dare stop.” You whine into his pillow. 
“Not planning on it, Meshla.” He groans. 
Meshla
 The word makes your stomach do a flip and a shiver runs down your spine. He had used to call you that so long ago, used to whisper it so lovingly into the darkness as he kissed you

It almost throws you for a loop, but Mando’s skilled thrusts bring you back to the present. The sound of his voice and his pounding of his cock is sending you over the edge, making you soak his cock and clench down around him.   
You moan into his pillow, enjoying how much it smells of him as your orgasm makes you tighten around him.  
He moans loudly as he pulls out of you, letting his cum spill all over your ass. Grabbing your cheeks with his broad hands and squeezing down on the plumb skin, smearing his seed further around your ass.    
And that’s it. You both take a short moment to catch your breath and compose yourself and then you leave his bunk, retreating to the fresher to get yourself cleaned up and afterwards locking yourself in your tiny room. You fall asleep almost immediately after your head lands on the pillow, the adrenaline finally gone from your system and your body warned out by the warm shower and amazing orgasm you just had.
Mando fucking your brains out becomes a thing
 You continue to avoid each other as much as possible on The Crest, ignoring the other when the sparse space on the ship forces you into the same proximity. But you’re being cooperative and team players on hunts and whenever you come back from one and you have frozen the bounty in the carbonite chamber and put Grogu to bed, you follow Mando into his bunk.   
You don’t let yourself dwell on it too much. Your relationship with Mando is never gonna go back to how it was, you had known a different version of him and you can not let yourself get pulled in again, but the sex is amazing. 
But one hunt changes your new routine. 
Mando had been sliced by one of the Trandoshan bounties vibroblade knives; it had cut him between his armour plates. He had shrugged it off as nothing, but now that you see it in the bright light of the cargo hold after coming back on the ship it’s clear that it’s deeper than you first thought, a wet spot of blood has formed on his flight suit. It is soon clear to you that this isn’t something that can be fixed by a bit of bacta spray.
“Kriff, Mando
” You huff, making him sit down on a crate. “You need stitches.”
“Mhm
” He groans, beginning to stand up.  
“What are you doing?” 
“Going to the fresher to sew this.” He says it matter of factly as he gestures to his side. 
“Sit down, you’re not going to stitch yourself up while I’m here. It’s your face you can’t show, not your body.” You want to add that he has seen you completely naked many times, but you don’t.
“Won’t be the first time I’ve stitched myself up after a hunt
” He gruffs.
You just shake your head at his comment. “Shut up and sit down Mando.” You say as you go to get a first aid kit. 
The armour that covers his torso is gone by the time you come back and he is just about to pull the flight suit down, exposing his upper body for you.   
Golden muscles painted with scars of varying shape and sizes, you struggle to keep your eyes from wandering over his beautiful form. It is not like you haven’t seen a shirtless person before, far from it, but something about seeing him bare in front of you in this context makes your heartbeat a little faster. He removes pieces of his armour for you, making sure the hard metal isn’t uncomfortable when you have sex, but he doesn't strip down for it, never remove his suit. Your face is suddenly feeling warm. There is nothing sexual about this, he is not pounding into you as he groans filth in your ear, it’s just him bare and vulnerable in front of you. His broad chest slowly sinks and rises as you cleanse the cut. His exposed skin is warm under your hands and it suddenly feels like your hands are on fire, you quickly remove them from his skin. 
You rummage through the first aid kit to get the sterile needle and self-dissolving threat, struggling to get the items out of their seals as your usually always steady hands now have begun to slightly shake. You place the blame for your current state on the adrenaline from the hunt which is still rummaging through your body, but the feeling of Mando’s visor on you is suddenly very overwhelming in the sharp light of the cargo hold. You get yourself under control, forcing your hands to steady before you start patching up Mando.       
He doesn’t even flinch as you penetrate his skin. You work quick and precise, finishing up by sealing the wound with a bacta patch.
“Thank you.” His voice is low and slightly shaky.
Something about this feels way more intimate than the nights you come back from hunts and he fucks you and it’s throwing you off.
You decide to not follow him into his bunk tonight

Days go by, you and Mando are way more civil towards each other, no bickering or harsh looks, but now another tension is in the air between you, one there is ambivalent and hard to describe. Something has changed between you, but you don’t know what. You have not had sex after you stitched him up that night. 
Instead you lock yourself in your room after hunts and every other night for that matter. You can’t help but feel weak under the gaze of his visor. The anger you had felt for him for so many years has slowly faded away. The loss of this anger has given place for something else, and as much as you’re suppressing it, you can’t help but yearn for a future where the two of you could be what you once had been. You wish you could just talk to him. 
A couple of weeks go by like this. 
You’re sitting in your bunk, you have  just come back from meeting with Karga. You don’t know how you feel about this new job you and Mando just have gotten, it’s not your usual mission. You’ll have to infiltrate an exclusive club on Daiyu where a lot of high profiled spice cartel members are hanging out. You really don’t want to do this, but with the pay Karga offered for this particular job done you would be able to buy a new ship, and you couldn’t say no to that. Karga had even offered to look after Grogu while you and Mando are doing the job, since there’s no way you can bring him. 
You don’t like the premise of the mission,but it is too good of an opportunity to say no to. You’ll soon be back on a ship of your own alone and free to do as you please, but for some reason you’re still not happy. You just want to be alone right now but you need to climb up to the cockpit, you’ll soon reach the hyperspace route. 
You sit down in the chair without saying a word, it’s weird to not have Grogu on your lap, already haven gotten so used to it. You know that he is safe with Karga, but you have begun to feel protective of him which isn’t good, you will soon be leaving and the more you bond with him the harder it’ll be to say goodbye. 
You actually stay up in the cockpit after entering hyperspace this time, you have to discuss the plan for the mission with Mando.   
There is no way Mando is going to be able to blend in with his armour, so you decide that you will enter the club by going undercover and he will be sneaking into the back rooms hopefully unnoticed. You have had a few clothing items that could have worked at such a place, but they had all been burned to a crisp with The Lining. Luckily it will be easy to find something for you at a place like Dinyu that will make you blend in at the fancy club. You are also not unaware that your looks have helped you out on mission’s before, many people, criminals included, seem more trusting and willing to put their guards down towards attractive women. You don’t particularly like using your ‘feminine charms’ on missions, but why not use what you got? You are not as big and strong as most of your coworkers and you know it gives results. A fancy looking dress and a little makeup and you’ll probably be able to get into that club without much trouble. In this one occasion you actually have an advantage that Mando doesn’t. 
And you were right in your predictions. It goes smoothly, a bat of your eyelash and a smile and you’re in. You play your part to perfection, you quickly have a good overview of the people present and soon you have spotted the person you had been looking for, a leader of a big cartel that runs on multiple planets. RukeĂ© Gdaou. You and Mando are not supposed to bring him in, these cartel leaders are way too powerful to be taken down by just two bounty hunters, the entire guild would become a target. But even just the smallest information about the man is worth a lot of money. You had been surprised when you saw a glimpse of him in one of the excluded vip balconies. He is not at all looking like what you had imagined. You had expected a rufflooking mobster, but instead found out he was a gorgeously handsome Togruta, and way younger than you had expected, probably only a few years older than yourself. 
You thought that it would be hard to get to him, since he is such a high profile leader, but you had underestimated how good you look in your new dress. You are being approached by a tall man in all black, giving off bodyguide vibes after only being at the club for around forty five minutes. He is telling you that Mister Gdaou had noticed you in the crowd and would like to invite you up for a drink. You are quick to accept, following the man up the stairs to the excluded area.  
You play your role well, accepting his offer of a drink with a smile. Laughing at the mobsters stupid jokes and sending seductive looks while sipping on your Merenzane Gold. It goes well, you don’t have any reason to think that he has any suspension about you. You don’t get much intel since you have to be very careful with your questions, but you still get some useful information here and there. He has just placed a hand on your exposed thigh, which every instinct in your body tells you to push away but you know you have to keep up the facade, so instead you smile sweetly at him. You’re opening your mouth, getting ready to risk asking something that might lead to some information when the sound of blaster fire is suddenly heard from the dancefloor under you. 
“What the
” RukĂ©e curses under his breath going to the railing of the balcony to look down. “I’ll be back in a moment, just have to check this out.” He tells you, leaving you alone as he brings his bodyguards with him.
That is when a low cough is heard from the shadows and you turn around to see Mando half concealed in the dim light, giving you a sign that he is here and that he is looking out for you.    
You know Mando is good, but damn. So much for the bodyguards and security at these places. 
RukĂ©e reappears. A smile that would have been charming if it wasn’t for the sleaziness that oozes from him, plastered on his sculpted face. 
“I’m sorry about that. I promise that you have my full attention now.” 
He has a sultry glimpse in his eyes that makes stomach turn with disgust. 
“Thank you, I’m very grateful for your attentiveness.” You take a quick glance over at where you know Mando is hiding. 
“Oh, I’m sure you are.” RukĂ©e answers with a humorous look that makes you want to puke. 
“And even though it’s nice up here, why don’t we go somewhere even more private?” He continues placing a hand on the small of your back to guide you towards a private room in the back. 
You open your mouth, but you don’t know what to say. You do not really want to go with him, but it will be a good opportunity to get him to talk some more and you can’t blow your cover now. You had prepared yourself to be in this situation before going into the mission and you’re so close to getting the information you need. You are in the middle of your internal battle when Mando steps out of the shadows.    
“I don’t think that will be necessary.” The tone of which Mando speaks could cut through beskar, and with that your cover is blown. 
The next twenty minutes pass in a blur. A real shootout breaks out, but Mando has got an escape route ready and you manage to both get out of the club unhurt.    
You made it back to The Crest in silence, Mando had turned his visor on you a couple of times but he had not said anything. He finally speaks after you have entered the ship, telling you to go directly to the cockpit since you have to leave the planet immediately. You just nod, and kick off your uncomfortable stilettos, climbing up the stairs to the cockpit ignoring how cold the durasteel floor is under your bare feet. 
You are both quiet doing the take off and the time it takes till you can hit hyperdrive, but Mando finally breaks the silence when the two of you are surrounded by the safety of hyperspace. 
“I’m sorry about what happened
 I should have been thinking before I acted, and found a better way to deal with the situation, but he was leading you away and I got scared.” 
He groans, the frustration in his voice is clear. 
“Good Maker, you have no idea how scared you make me Mesh’la!” He says as he drags a hand over his helmet. 
His words confuse you. “I’m scaring you..?”
“Yes, have for years
”
“That doesn’t make any sense Mando.”  
“I wanted to give you everything, you know.” He sighs all anger and frustration now gone from his voice. 
“What are you..?” You begin but he continues. 
“You have no idea of how many times I wanted to take my helmet off in front of you, how many times I was just about to do it. I would have given up everything if you had asked me to Mesh’la. My creed, The Way, everything
 You had the power to make me leave it all, and it scared me. I didn’t know how to deal with it so I left. I was selfish and I’m so sorry for hurting you
 I’ve broken my creed, taken my helmet off for Grogu, I’m a child of the watch no more.”
He let out a sigh, so desperate it makes your heart clench.
“I never stopped wanting you Mesh’la.”
“Mando, I
”
“Din.” He cuts you off.
“What..?” You mutter.
“My name, my real name, it’s Din
 Din Djarin.”
“Din
” You whisper, trying it out on your tongue, loving how it sounds. You feel your eyes getting stingy and your vision getting blurry from tears. You never stopped wanting him either. 
A loud hiss is echoing off the durasteel walls, and before you can registire what’s happening the loud thud of beskar hitting the floor ring in your ears. And there he is in front of you, Din Djarin, the deepest, most soulful brown eyes you have ever seen staring back at you. 
You let out a gasp. He's beautiful. 
“I love you Mesh’la. I’m sorry it has taken me so many years to tell you, and I understand if you-” 
You cut him off, crashing your lips on his, burying your fingers in his fluffy dark hair. He loves you?! You feel how your cheeks are getting wet from the tears that are now freely falling from your eyes. Din is kissing you back with a hunger that has your knees feeling weak  
“I love you too Din.” You whisper against his lips when you finally pull back from his lips for a breath of air. 
You feel the muscles of his arms flex around as he pulls you close against his chest. 
“I’m never letting go of you again, you know? You’re stuck with me now Mesh’la.” 
You inhale his scent, nuzzling your head against his broad chest plate. 
“I think I can live with that.” You happily chuckle. 
“You and Grogu are my everything. You’re the way for me now.”
Looks like you won’t be needing a new ship after all

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nordsea-horizons · 4 months ago
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Hi love! First of all, your islands are sooo amazing!! They invoke such a nostalgic and cozy vibe! I was looking through your old posts and absolutely fell in love with the summer version of Nordsea from 2022. I felt quite sad that I wasn’t able to visit it at the time (although your current version of Nordsea is breathtaking as well!). I was wondering if you had a picture of your map from the summer version just so I can get a better idea of how things were set up. Using the map and the pictures, maybe I can pretend that I’m touring it haha! Thank you for all the joy and creativity you bring to the ac community!! đŸ©·
Hi! thank you soo much, this is the sweetest message💕 i often look through my old island posts but im happily surprised that someone else has done the same!? thats so lovely to hearđŸ„ș💛 when i saw this ask i was a bit sad since i thought i would have to dissapoint on the map thing! i never save my maps for some reason(mostly bc i forget but also bc they tend to look kinda “ugly”😅 i never design based on making the map look good haha) But i actually found it deep down in my screenshots! you can def tell that i covered large parts of the island in the in-game path! i tried to fill in what i remember from the “empty” areas on the map!
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i really loved this island, it was the first seasonal island i did, and i always feel sad that the da’s are gone from those old islandsđŸ„Č thats why im so happy to have this blog to look back on! tysm for your message again💕 the ac community on here is such a comfort place to me, and getting an ask like this def reminds me why i love this blog and community❀
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hornyhornyhimbos · 2 years ago
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hiiii
Can I request either a Spencer or Hotch with the prompts
23. “Say my name.”
11. “Louder. Let me hear you.”
17. “Hands behind your back.”
Thaaaaank youuuu 💕
"Better Than Italian Food" ~ A. Hotchner
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Summary: uh idk, Reader makes Hotch dinner and somehow it gets spicy, don't ask me for summaries LMAO
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 1,369
Content Warning: MINORS DNI (18+ content), unprotected piv sex, oral f!receiving, fingering, slight masturbation from both parties, use of restraints, overstimulation, orgasm denial/delay, use of nicknames (one use of gorgeous), explicit language, mentions of food, lmk if i missed anything else
Extra Notes: this is my first time writing full on smut so pls don't judge
Based On the Prompts: "Say my name." ☆ "Louder. Let me hear you." ☆ "Hands behind your back."
Originally Written: 12/09/2022
smut prompts can be found here!
hornyhornyhimbos ask box can be found here!
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"Knock knock," Aaron called as he entered the house before bending down to untie his dress shoes. His arms flexed in his suit jacket as he did so, a sight that was somehow simple yet reminded me just how lucky I was to call him mine.
"Come in," I giggled, sashaying my way from the couch over to him. "How was work?"
He let out a sound that was somewhere between a groan and a chuckle. "Exhausting, as usual." He barely let his sentence slip into the air before leaning in and pressing his lips tightly against mine.
We stayed like that for a moment, just as we usually did when he made it home after a long workday. His palms settled on my waist as he pulled away.
My arms slithered around his shoulders. "Do you wanna talk about it?"
He shook his head. "You wanna know what I do want to talk about though?"
My eyebrows creased together as I tried to dissect his tone. "What would that be?"
"How good dinner smells, whatever it might be you're cooking," he chuckled, ambling toward the kitchen.
I followed after him, my hands fixed on his hips. "It's Alfredo. Courtesy of the recipe Rossi emailed me. Bread's in the oven."
He turned to face me, leaving another kiss on my lips. Upon pulling away, he commented, "I have no clue how I could ever thank you for being the wonderful wife that you are."
My stomach knotted for a moment, my eyebrow cooking upward. "I think I know a way."
That was how I found myself spread open on the edge of the king-sized mattress, Aaron's mouth nuzzled against my clit, whimpering a string of obscenities.
The coil in my stomach tightened, my brain started to go fuzzy. I felt my legs tighten around Aaron's head, his raven hair brushing against the skin of my bare legs.
My vision went spotty for a moment. My orgasm was close. I let out a low mewl, my hips bucking up into his tongue. My veins burned as-
Beep! Beep! Beep!
I let out an aggravated groan as I assumed one of the two of us would have to get the bread from the oven.
The bread must've been the furthest thing from Aaron's mind as he left his head buried in my cunt.
"B-baby," I moaned in an attempt to get his attention.
He pulled away just long enough to utter, "Say my name."
My breathing became heavy as my orgasm inched closer again. "A-A-" I struggled, my hips rutting in betrayal.
"Say. My. Name."
"A-Aaron, the bread," I managed, fists clenched tight around the silk bed sheets beneath me.
"Frankly," he mumbled against my clit, eliciting another mewl from my lips, "the only thing I'm worried about eating is this pretty pussy."
"Frankly," I copied weakly, "I don't want our house to burn down."
He huffed, the air hitting my naked core and sending a shiver up my spine. "Be right back," he mumbled, wiping his lip with his thumb.
As he walked away, my mind wandered deviously. I felt betrayed by my hand as a finger hooked into my hole, chasing down the orgasm I'd nearly lost.
I let out a whimper as it pumped in and out, the coil in my belly tightening once again. My vision went spotty as I nearly reached the edge.
Aaron entered the room, tsk-ing his tongue against the roof of his mouth. "What have we here?"
"A-Aaron," I gasped, moving my hand away from my center. "I can ex-"
"Give me your hand," he demanded.
Hesitantly, I lifted my hand to his. He brought my hand to his lips, sucking on the end of my pointer finger. "Tastes good," he smirked. "Bet it felt good too."
My eyes widened as a breath hitched in my throat. I tried to swallow it down, but instead, it lingered there, causing both my throat and mouth to feel suddenly dry.
"You can say it," he said, dropping my hand.
I opted not to verbally answer. Instead I just nodded, a moan perched on the edge of my tongue as I watched the change in his behavior.
"Hands behind your back."
I did as told, standing up from the bed and letting my arms settle behind me.
He scrambled to undo his tie, wrapping it so tight around my wrists I wasn't sure it wouldn't leave bruises. He lowered me onto the mattress before unbuttoning his slacks, sliding them down along with his boxers. As quickly as possible, he undid his shirt too, throwing it into the pile with the rest of our discarded clothing.
He lowered his hand to my mouth before demanding, "Spit."
I didn't hesitate. I managed to spit into his palm, though I was unsure how, given the state of my parched throat.
He ran his hand along his hardened dick, and the sight elicited another sinful groan from my mouth.
He ran the tip along my slit teasingly. The sound of my wetness mixing with his pre-cum was something that could only be described as unholy.
After a moment more of teasing me, he pushed in, the stretch making me gasp. "You cum when I say you cum. Got it?"
Somehow, I successfully nodded again, a soft yelp falling from my tongue as he maneuvered the angle of my hips.
He pushed in and out repeatedly, both of our orgasms building quickly. I wasn't sure who'd cum first, but I knew both of our climaxes were approaching and fast.
Though, just as I feared, he pulled out, his hand meeting his cock, squeezing it hard. "I think this is only fair," he grunted, rocking against his palm, "since you got to finish yourself off too."
"But I didn't," I whined, humping at anything that would bring fiction to my pussy.
"Why do I not believe you?"
"Aaron, please, I promise," I whimpered.
He chuckled, his chest nearly heaving as he did so. "You'll need to do better than that, gorgeous."
My hips rutted against the fabric below me again. "Aaron, please let me cum," I begged, my skin feeling hot as I watched him pump himself again and again.
"Louder. Let me hear you," he ordered as he continued to squeeze his length. "I'm gonna need to hear you if you really want it."
My eyes fluttered into the back of my head and I cried out, "Please, Aaron, I need to cum."
He released his shaft before lining himself up with me once more. "I knew you could do it," he praised, sinking into me again.
He slammed in and out of me, his balls slamming against my ass with every thrust. He growled at the feeling of my walls clenching around his cock.
For what felt like the hundredth time that night, my orgasm approached, my veins burning hot again.
"In or out?" Aaron asked. I didn't even need an explanation.
"In," I choked out. "Need to feel you fill me up."
I wasn't sure how, but we both released in sync, his seed warm inside me as I arched away from the bed.
I felt stuffed as he lay down on top of me, the smell of sweat prominent in the air. His hair was sticky as he placed his head on my chest, mumbling sweet nothings into the valley of my breasts.
I let out a whimper as he finally removed himself. Suddenly, I missed the feeling of being stretched open by him.
His fingers moved down to my cunt, pumping fast. I let out a, "Hnnnngg, fuck, Aaron," as two digits worked at my core.
"You wanted it in, didn't you?" he groaned, watching as his cum pushed into me.
Eventually, he moved his hand away from me, upon noticing me writhing from the overstimulation.
He moved up to lay beside me on the bed, collapsing back beside me. A nearly childish chuckle escaped his mouth, his cheeks flushing even redder than they already were.
"What's so funny?" I panted, running my hand along the hairs on his chest.
"Nothing," he chuckled once more. "Anyone ever tell you that you taste way better than Italian food?"
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-> Taglist will be found here!
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therentyoupay · 5 months ago
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OH MY GOD are you cool with sharing how your husband proposed to you at Neuschwanstein Castle?!!!!!!!!
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sure!!! he did such a good job, i love this story. 😂💕
i presented at a conference in 2022 in europe and dragged my then-boyfriend along lol. he'd never been to europe before! we paid for a one-day private tour around bavaria and neuschwanstein for the last day of our trip.
after going inside the castle (amazing), our tour guides (a duo!) took us to the scary bridge (maria bridge) to get a different view:
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please know that my husband is terrified of heights lmao.
while we were on the bridge he was clearly nervous and i—i, who went skydiving two days after i turned eighteen, who loves rollercoasters, who likes adrenaline, generally—was likewise not fully able to take in all the splendor of the fairytale on such a rickety-feeling bridge with so many damn people (and with so many gaps below for phones to potentially slip through!!), so i turned to him and was like, "let's go back."
the man took one look at me, told me, "No," and then fled to the other side of the bridge.
your girl was wearing comfortable footwear, but she had not been planning to chase down her man on a low-key terrifying and crowded bridge over a yawning chasm to a mysterious mountain on the other side, so by the time i got to land, he was already 10 paces ahead. (in retrospect, this should have tipped me off immediately; he would never leave me behind!!! in the moment, i chalked it up to his overwhelming fear of heights and a random burst of self-preservation instincts, but i should have known better, because he would not have left me to die for something as measly as a fear of heights lmao... just proposing 😂)
he would wait for me to catch up on this mysteriously winding dirt (read: MUD) path we'd ended up on after the bridge, but then, as soon as i caught up, he took off up the mountain again. :P
"let's just go back! we don't know what's even over here!"
mind you, at this point, i am now walking this dirt path uphill, and there are like, four people over here, and he's not even holding my hand and watching over me as i make my way up the mountain (like he always does!!!), so now i'm doubly annoyed and wondering why he's desperate to get to the top of this mountain—especially since our tour guides are still waiting for us on the other side of the bridge and are probably wondering where the hell we are.
"not yet!"
by the time we reach the end of the dirt/mud path, i am (a) annoyed, (b) huffing and puffing from the mild sprint we just did up this muddy mountain, (c) pleasantly surprised to find a small, relatively private lookout point with a BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL view of the castle.
there is someone there with a canvas, painting in watercolors. a photographer is taking tons of gorgeous photos. there's like seven people in this little muddy clearing and lookout point, total. it's ridiculously beautiful, and all of my Disney childhood and fairytale dreams are totally satisfied lmao. this is the first place near the castle that has been calm.
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we're there for a while, completely enjoying the lack of crowds and this totally majestic view.
at last, i am forced to reluctantly admit, "okay, you were right, this fiasco was definitely worth the random mountain hike." i am still a little annoyed, of course, but it's not so bad now. 😂 it's abating.
until he snarks, "this probably would have been a pretty good place to propose, no?"
still annoyed, and now more so, especially since i've been genuinely waiting for him to propose for like six months, i snark back, "well, then maybe next time bring a ring why don't you?"
he dropped to one knee. 😂
the photographer—who was, in fact, just a random passerby taking his own pictures of the majestic castle—sees my then-boyfriend pull a ring out of his pocket and starts ignoring the castle to take 100000 photos of us random strangers in front of the castle instead, as my then-boyfriend-turned-fiancĂ©-now-husband asked me, "will you marry me?"
spoiler alert: i said yes 😂 the photographer later shared all of the photos with us via email and we sent him a nice big coffee shop digital gift card despite his protests. i was desperately clutching my left hand into a crazy-tight fist (with a new big fat diamond on it!!!!!!) as i went back over the too-scary bridge, while my husband held my right hand (finally 😂).
my favorite favorite photo is the close-up of my husband's knee, in which his jeans are completely and utterly covered in mud. 😂😂😂😂😂💕💕
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madam-of-lithuania · 30 days ago
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"à«źâ‚ ‹’‹˶|💌 beep. .! one new messageˎˊ˗
Hello Gaby!
When did you get into hetalia? When did you begin to like LietCan?
Also how are you today? Have you eaten something today? Drank something today?
Have a fantastic day! - đŸȘžđŸȘœđŸȘ·
Hello anon :)
I'm got into hetalia fandom in 2021 or 2022 so I'm still new to this fandom just like how I'm still new to Iammatthewian/Project Canada fandom.
I discovered My OTP CanLiet by accident when finding some old fanfic's in fanfiction.net and old and some new CanLiet fanfic's in Ao3 and CanLiet fanarts here in Tumblr, and I love how they were written and the chemistry they are so made for each other I'm love them so much, that's how I'm became a biggest CanLiet shipper đŸ‡šđŸ‡ŠđŸ‡±đŸ‡čđŸ’–âœšïž
I'm doing fine, but I'm still sad from that day but I'm doing fine but I'm still miss her a lot(my current ex friend )😔 but I'm doing fine 🙂 and my throat hurts a little bit and I'm taken my medicine 💊 but I'm doing fine physically 🙂
I'm eaten Kibinai(Karaite origin this pastrie is originated and they are popular here in Lithuania)with curd and the sun dry tomatoes is really delicious 😋
And today I'm drank bubble tea and this was my last time drinking authentic Taiwanese bubble tea because my most favourite and beloved bubble tea is closing and gonna move to the capital city of Lithuania and the largest city in Lithuania, Vilnius, and I was sad that is closing in my home city Kaunas and I'm said goodbye to kind staff/worker/waitress and also asked how to make bubble tea especially with my most beloved and favourite matcha flavour bubble tea so that I could make it in home, since now that my home city Kaunas doesn't have authentic Taiwanese bubble tea shop anymore, I'm know they're is other bubble tea shop in my home city Kaunas but is not that delicious or authentic like how is my most favourite and beloved the authentic Taiwanese bubble tea shop was 🧋💔
AčiĆ«(Thank you) you too have a great and wonderful day ☀ or night đŸŒ™đŸ™‚đŸ˜ŠđŸ’œđŸ’•đŸ’™đŸ’–â™„ïžđŸ’—â€ïž
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lady-phasma · 6 months ago
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You mentioned you took a hiatus, I wondered why that was and why so long? I’m sorry you went through that đŸ«‚
Hi anon! Thank you for that. đŸ«‚
I didn't make it public back then and I won't now. I will say that it was one half fandom drama and one half my real life took priority.
I lost some moots back in Jan 2023 who meant a lot to me and when we discovered we had differences of opinion about behavior we had a falling out. The stress got to a point where it wasn't worth checking my Tumblr for anything.
In November 2022 my grand aunt died (I say aunt though). I am her carbon copy. She was one of my best friends in the world. I am literally her mini-me. I was living in Italy at the time and I was supposed to move in with her when I returned home (I gave up my US apartment to be able to afford my stay in Italy).
I came back to the states in Dec 2022 and my depression and homesickness for Italy were devastating. Living in the house without her, surrounded by her things, those moots helped me survive. Literally.
Our chats, our chaos, our fun in the fandom helped me until some things happened that I disagreed with. Near the end of January 2023 I quietly went on hiatus because the disappointment and anxiety were not helping me in my actual life.
I got better. I didn't write much but I have about 200 hobbies and focused on those. I grieved, am grieving, will always be grieving, my aunt. But I keep going.
Then I saw Dune 2 this March and fell for Feyd Rautha. Hard. I had to start writing and I had to come back to Tumblr. I promised myself that this time I would not let the internet control my emotions and I would make Tumblr my happy place by sheer force of will if necessary. I do this purposefully every time I log on. 💕
My aunt was an amazing woman btw. She was a registered nurse for almost 60 years, was the kindest person, and took no bullshit from anyone. She was blunt and stood up against wrongs when she saw them. She fought for people who couldn't fight for themselves. She loved everyone equally unless they were bullies, hurtful, or vindictive. She and my Grannie (who is about to turn 95 years old) and my mom taught me what it means to love unconditionally. But my aunt taught me the value of being a bitch.
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missmielyhoran · 2 years ago
Text
Love Story
Face Claim- none
Male!yn cause why not?
This is not me putting a label on Harry's sexuality. He has made it clear he's unlabeled, and honestly, it's not any of our business, but I thought this was just a cute concept.
Masterlist
*****
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liked by yourclassmate, definitelynotharrystyles, Florencefinsta and 40 others
Yourinstagram My professor didn't believe last time I said Mr. Darcy ate my homework...I have proof this time.
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definitelynotharrystyles Maybe feed him actual food and not homework you don't want to do!
Yourinstagram Sometimes I wonder if you really love me or not
definitelynotharrystyles I flew from LA at 3 am emergency flight cause you had a hangover!
Yourmom Focus on studies Y/N
Florencefinsta It's always the orange cat💀
Yourinstagram I blame Harry
definitelynotharrystyles You bought him?!
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liked by Yourinstagram, JeffAzoff, Florencefinsta and 22 others
definitelynotharrystyles Night routine💕
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Yourinstagram You were reading smut while I was sleeping in your lap?
definitelynotharrystyles You were sleeping what was I supposed to do?
Yourinstagram I don't know...SLEEP? or read with me?
Florencefinsta Look at his cute button noseđŸ„ș
definitelynotharrystyles I know rightđŸ„ș
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liked by GemmaStyles, definitelynotharrystyles, PillowPerson and 35 others
Yourinstagram Last date before he goes off to tour :(
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definitelynotharrystyles My offer to come with me still stands baby
Yourinstagram I have exams babe or I would have been the first one to hop on your little jet😭
Florencefinsta I will comeover and we can have a sleepover
Yourinstagram Yeah I need it or I will dissociate without him
GemmaStyles I will also join!
Yourinstagram bring Anne too the more the merrier
definitelynotharrystyles Heyyy I will be left out :(
PillowPerson Please tell me you will be there at some of the shows 😭
Yourinstagram Two or three only
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liked by Florencefinsta, Yourmom, definitelynotharrystyles and 37 others
Yourinstagram I want to wear his initial on a chain round my neck
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Yourinstagram p.s.- Just watched dwd and Florence carried the whole movie sorry not sorry @/definitelynotharrystyles
Florencefinsta I LOVE YOU!!
Yourinstagram I LOVE YOU MORE
definitelynotharrystyles My boyfriend has been stolen guys
definitelynotharrystyles I love that necklace
Yourinstagram I know you do, you narcissist
Yourinstagram rather have another necklace though👀
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liked by Harryfan3, Harryfan1, Harryfan4 and 567,987 others
DailyMail As it was singer, Harry Styles has been recently spotted getting cosy with a man. The singer has been on tour for a long time and was seen by some fans at a small secluded cafe.
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Harryfan1 Oh? This was a plot twist
Harryfan2 I saw them omg his boyfriend is so cute!
Harryfan3 Spill bestie
Harryfan2 My uncle owns that cafe and I sometimes go around to help him that's when I saw them sitting in far back talking and being cutesy😭You don't understand how hard it was not freak out and take their orders
Harryfan3 OMG
Harryfan4 Sleeping in this fandom is forbidden
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liked by harry_lambert, ashemusic, GemmaStyles and 3,034,789 others
harrystyles Love On Tour. New York City II. August, 2022.
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Harryfan1 He looks so cute!
harris_reed It's giving camp candy cane and I'm obsessed.
Harryfan3 He didn't tag loyd? if he didn't took this who did?
Yourinstagram Candy Cane king
liked by harrystyles
Harryfan2 wait who's this and why is their account private?
Harryfan3 Harry follows them!
Harryfan4 Mystery man?
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liked by Florencefinsta, NiallHoran, GemmaStyles and 25 others
definitelynotharrystyles Good morning mystery man ;)
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Yourinstagram who's that handsome fella👀 is he single?
definitelynotharrystyles no happily taken by me😌
Florencefinsta You two are so cringy
definitelynotharrystyles old cat lady is jealous
Yourinstagram Old cat lady!!
Florencefinsta I don't even have cat you do
GemmaStyles Welcome to the club
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liked by Annetwist, harris_reed, mrdrdawson and 3,070,394 others
harrystyles TIFF. September, 2022.
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harry_lambert ❀
Harryfan1 He😭brought😭his😭boyfriend😭to😭mp😭premier😭
Harryfan2 Whole fandom will be in shock for next few days
Harryfan3 His boyfriend is so cute? What the hell?
Yourinstagram cheeky smile
liked by harrystyles
A year later-
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liked by Florencepudge, Annetwist, Yourinstagram and 7,997,225 others
harrystyles From my best friend to my muse, my lover and now my fiance. I'm lucky to have to❀
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Harryfan1 Are you shitting me?
Harryfan2 HOLY FUCK
Annetwist Congrats my loves❀
Harris_reed đŸŒˆâ€ïž
GemmaStyles Finally! Congratulations little bro💕
Harryfan4 I need 5-4 buisness days to comprehend this
Yourinstagram You annoy the fuck out of me but I love youđŸ™„â€ïž
harrystyles I love you too dramaqueen :)
*****
I hope you liked it!
Please Like, Comment and Reblog
You can talk to me here♡ requests are semi-closed
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batbabydamian · 1 year ago
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Batman and Robin (2023) #1 is out!! 🩇💕
Spoilers and lots of rambling below
Loved hopping in mid-mission with Bruce and Damian banter - the first issues of Damian's B&R 2009 and 2011 runs have Batman and Robin’s relationship on a rocky start, so it’s a refreshing change!
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Bruce rhyming with the pause like he’s really thinking about it LOL he's having fun!!
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"You roll your eyes just like your mother" SO CUUTE!! a nice way of relating Damian to Talia in a habit haha (would also be neat if Damian had some of his mom's physical features heehee...haha...) Also "it's just us here for a bit." Would anyone else from the batfam be staying there in the future? đŸ€”
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OKAY really want to delve into Damian cutting Bruce off here, since we're mostly in Bruce's POV atm.
Bruce saying that he's happy Damian chose to live with him seems to impose the idea Damian chose Bruce over Talia. From how Bruce thought Talia should "never claim Damian" i don't think that's something Damian wants to hear, especially after Damian already chose not to be on either of his parent's side!!
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Batman VS Robin (2022) #4
In the end of his Robin book, Damian says he's still figuring out who he is, so i'm wondering if he's conflicted about losing that independence of being able to carve a path of his own now that he's with Bruce again. Either way, Damian's (VERY CUTE!!) self insert AU story gives us a glimpse of his concerns about his parents and not getting to be a teenager đŸ„ș
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ANYWAY. OBSESSED WITH THIS!! HIS COMIC THUMBNAILS!! THE RANDOM ANIME EYES IN THE CORNER!! WELCOME BACK ARTIST DAMIAN 😭
EXPRESSING HIMSELF THROUGH DRAWING FROM GORE/HORROR TO FAMILY/OBSERVATIONS TO EXPERIMENTING WITH MANGA/COMICS!! ALL SO VALID AND WONDERFUL 😭
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Damian quoting Alfred and probably cooking something he used to make for him?? i'm crying
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Detective Comics (2016) Annual #4
We've really gone from Damian just leaving a reminder for Bruce to restock the fridge to Damian cooking breakfast for the both of them đŸ„ș
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THIS IS MY FAV PANEL IN THIS ENTIRE ISSUE LOL fav just eating well, cheeks full of food, so cute!! and Damian sounds like he's referring to when Bruce enrolled him to the school in Metropolis lol Though Bruce's reason was also to benefit Damian, he's better communicating that this time!
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Super Sons (2017) #10
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LOVE DAMIAN'S ROBIN MOBILE!! glad he's moved on from the batmobile and just got his own - it's very much the opposite too in how it's bright, open, and bulky where the batmobile's dark and sleek!
The last part of the issue showcases Di Meo's action! i was pretty worried about it, because when i first saw his interiors for DC VS Vampires (2021) i barely understood what was happening im so sorry sir 😭 Honestly, it was still jarring but much better! HUGE shoutout to their Letterer Steve Wands, because the SFX and dialogue placement improved the flow a lot!
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Final thoughts: GORGEOUS ART, FUN WRITING, I LOVE DAMIAN!! i'm analyzing way too much but i'm just so happy to have an ongoing with Damian again (with a writer that actually! likes him!) 😭
My hopes are we get those fun stylized panels of Damian's art/comics where we get insight on his headspace similar to the shoujo panels from Robin!! Reunion of Damian and his pets!! And it's still early, but still holding out for Williamson to keep to his word on this!! 👀
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mysterygrl20 · 11 months ago
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My Top 9 albums of 2023
I got tagged by @blmpff. thank you 💕
I listen to mainly kpop. So i guess this is my favorite kpop albums of 2023. And my spotify is heavily tied to stationhead for listening parties so it's very biased and unreliable.
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First off: Ateez and their 3 EPs they released this year stole my heart and overtook SKZ.
Halazia from Ateez's Spin off: From the Witness was a mini EP. This started my year as they literally released it Dec. 30, 2022 so I didn't add the album cover up there in the top 9. I was also still lowkey freaking out as I had got to see them in concert Nov. 2022 and they had Xikers (pre-debut) perform with them. And I watched this music video way too many times.
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1. Outlaw - Ateez. This is a no skip album. I love every single one of these. Don't make me choose a favorite.
2. The World EP.FIN: Will - Ateez. I picked one of my favorite group songs off this but their unit songs are amazing: Everything- Jongho and IT's You (Yeosang, San, Wooyoung)
3. Dual - The Rose. I got to see them TWICE this year: Sept & Oct. 2023 and had a BLAST. This album is amazing. Also I really liked the album cover.
4. Rockstar - Stray Kids. Another no skip album. I got to see SKZ in March 2023 for their Maniac tour. And Mr. Bang keeps me delulu on Bubble.
5. 5-STAR - Stray Kids. [hehe fitting] Another no skip album. My number one song was obviously S-Class. Superbowl shook me to my core. And then they made me cry with Youtiful.
6. Deadlock - Xdinary Heroes. They spelled out FUCK YOU in their title song Freakin' Bad.
7. The Name Chapter: Temptation - Tomorrow x Together. I saw TXT in May 2023... It's an EP of 5 great songs.
8. Dark Blood - Enhypen. My vampires. I literally made a BL gifset to the lyrics of their song Bite Me. Another favorite: Chaconne.
9. House of Tricky: Doorbell Ringing - Xikers (and also their other EP: How to Play) I got to shanty (Tricky House) with them pre-debut. I love their concept too. Also Tricky House some how made it in my top 15 songs for 2023.
Honorable Mention:
FML- Seventeen. There's just something about this album I like.
The Name Chapter: Freefall - TXT. Solely for Blue Spring being on it.
SKZ Replay: I also hold this close to my heart as it was a christmas gift from Stray Kids in 2022. So it feels more like a 2023 album. It also has the most whiplash between songs.
Single: Dum Dum - Jeff Satur (and also Steal the Show) but also Macarena - Blitzers and Baggy Jeans - NCT U [which they also added to an album] and the eurovision winner Cha Cha Cha - KÀÀrijÀ.
or title tracks like: Shalala by Taeyong or Guilty by Taemin that I want to include for reasons.
Favorite OST from 2023: Let's Try from OFTS. I listened to this every Friday waiting for the new episode to be released. And it should have made it into my spotify 2023 playlist. I almost picked MSP's cover of Tilly Bird's Just Being Friendly.
Tagging but no pressure @trashlie, @thatdamngoodlookingbutterfly, @quadruple-agent, @theteatimechronicles @tinytalkingtina @theelast-straw @aceoflights and anyone else who wants to join in.
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ofmermaidstories · 9 months ago
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Oh gosh. My mom had a transplant
 it was similar in the way we kinda knew whose organ lives through her now. I helped her put together the letter—the family wasn’t comfortable responding and that’s okay. Enough time has passed that we don’t think about as often as we used to—the scar is healed and the raised skin is just another part of mom now. But once it was a red itchy reminder of a beautiful wonderful life wrongfully cut short. Thank you for including the grief and guilt of that experience.
Here in Australia, the website for the donor registry is called donate life. They have like, a bunch of facts and figures—80,000 people a year die in hospital (a requirement to meet before your organs can be donated), but like, of those 80 thousand only a tiny, tiny fraction (roughly 1400 of them in 2022) are eligible. And then that number gets halved again, when the families are asked for permission. đŸ„ș I’m not sure how much it differs, country to country, but with such intense odds it really does make organ donation such an incredible gift. đŸ„ș Guilt is so, so natural, to so much of what we do let alone something so—hard. But I keep thinking about what you said, about your mum’s scar now being healed—and how much of a gift that is, too. How much of a difference it makes. đŸ„șđŸŒ·
All any of us can do is our best. With the gifts we’re given, or the gifts we give others. And you and your Mum are doing beautifully, Anon. Here’s to so, so much life together—for you, for Mum, and for Mum’s heart. đŸ’•đŸŒ·â˜€ïž
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angel-inrealtime · 2 years ago
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November F1c Prompts Day 30
A/N: finally! It's only taken an extra,,,4 months, or so. Oops. I love this little sunshine verse. I'm so happy that I could share it with everyone who's enjoyed it 💕
30. Nociception: Pain
July 2020, Styrian Grand Prix, post-FP1
“He’s alright.” Michael tries, looking to Blake for support.
The other man clears his throat. “Yeah but maybe don’t...the real wound is pride, y’know?”
Your fingernails have dug into the skin of your arms, crescent moons only just not deep enough to scratch, and you raise an eyebrow at the pair. “I’m not gonna bitch at him for crashing, guys. Come on. I just...I wanna know he’s alright with my own eyes.”
He doesn’t make a habit of it. Which is good. You’re not sure you could take it if this feeling were a regular occurrence.
“I’m alright.” He sounds sheepish, from over your shoulder.
You whip around to look at him as soon as you hear his voice. “Daniel...”
“No I am, I promise.” He’s limping a bit but tucks you under his arm and kisses the top of your head. “Just totally lost the back end, we fucked the setup, I think. I hit my knee and there’s a wicked bruise, but I’m good. They let me out and said I can just take painkillers.”
You wrap your arms around him and squeeze. “Glad you’re okay.” You breathe.
/
2021
“How are you doing, love?” He peels the covers from over your head, endlessly gentle. “Feeling any better?”
You chance cracking your eyes open and realise he drew the blackout blinds over before pulling the covers off your head. “Head still hurts., a bit.” It takes your brain a second to catch up. “Wait, when did you
”
He grins as he sinks down onto the bed, careful not to jostle you. “You were dead to the world when I got back, I thought I’d let you rest.”
You try moving and find it doesn’t make you want to throw up anymore, then drag yourself closer to rest your head on his chest, burrowing into his hoodie. “Missed you.”
“Lil old me?” He drawls, definitely trying to coax a laugh out of you (it works). “I should be so lucky.”
“It’s true.” You say, aiming for demure. He’s already ruining it with barely contained giggles. “Days and days I sat here, wondering when my handsome cowboy would return. So much I fell ill, the most terrible migraine.” You take the hand from his chest and put it palm up on your own forehead, feigning a swoon.
He’s laughing outright now, catches your hand and settles you mostly on top of him. “Well, nothin’ to worry about now darlin’. I’m here.” He hums against your mouth when you lean down to kiss him.
“m’hungry.”
“I made dinner.”
You kiss him again, day long migraine fog leaving. “You’re my favourite.”
/
Belgian Grand Prix (post race), 2022
“There you...” You stop in your tracks, realise he’s alone and the lights are off, just the outline of his back (still in fireproofs) visible in the light from the door you’ve opened. “Daniel? Are you..?”
You let yourself in and feel your way across the small room to him, heart clenching when you realise his shoulder is shaking under your hand. “Danny...” You start, then you feel more than see him shake his head.
“I just...” His voice sounds raw and you wonder for a second if he and Michael fought, but you would have heard, this place is so small and on top of each other. “I wanted it to be like a big fuck you, right. But it was just...” He sniffs as you settle next to him, arms snaking around his waist. “Kind of pathetic. I tried so fucking hard, like...”
“I know, my love, I know you did.” You make your voice as soft as you can, like it can settle around him like a blanket, take away the pain in his voice. The doorhandle rattles and you only turn your head towards the door as the light starts to appear when it opens. “No.”
It shuts again instantly, and he tries to laugh. “Scary voice.”
You burrow as close to him as you can. “Everyone who matters knows how hard you’ve tried, okay? I know it doesn’t make all the...noise, any quieter. But...”
“It doesn’t matter.” He says quietly. “It is what it is.”
“Of course it matters, Daniel.” You reiterate quietly. “If you’re gonna be throwing around cliches maybe start with ‘you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink’. Y’know, if the horse is a team, and leading it is giving useful feedback, and the water is making a good car.”
He laughs wetly, one hand playing with the silver bracelet that matches his favourite Tiffany’s necklace. You stopped differentiating jewellery years ago, it all sits in the same box on the dressing table at home now. “Message received loud and clear.”
You push your head against his, unbothered by his sweatiness. “It’s okay that it hurts, too. It always does, when you-“
“Try your best but you don’t succeed?”
“Did you just...” You can almost feel him trying not to laugh. “Did you just quote Coldplay at me?”
“Who could say.”
“Daniel, I was trying to have a supportive partner moment and you’ve just quoted Coldplay lyrics at me.”
The laughter spills over and he brings his arms around you, pressing his face into your neck. “You’re right, that’s unforgivable.”
-
2025
“You’re so pretty.” He says right near your ear, hand curling around your waist.
You’ve managed to avoid FIA end of season functions for the most part, because Daniel doesn’t particularly enjoy them. But Christian had insisted, this year. “I feel like I’m too old for this and it shows.” You say back around a smile for the cameras swirling around you all.
“Nah,” he puts his mouth close to your ear and you can feel how cheeky his smile is (dread the day that Elio or Allegra work out how to master the same cheeky grin), “Big MILF vibes, I rate it.”
Max, of all people, overhears and they set each other off laughing, even as you roll your eyes and let Geri pull you in for a photo with her.
It’s boring, mostly, even if you’re grateful for any occasion which gets Daniel in a suit (particularly the green Gucci one, still love it as much as you had in the first place). The food is nice and the wine is good, although you’re not particularly looking forward to pumping at the end of the night just to throw it away. It’s a rare night without the kids, Daniel’s parents happy for the excuse to travel and babysit (even if they’re about to have a full summer of all of you).
It’s nice actually, after a couple of years of not being at every race – and preoccupied with small children when you were – to catch up with people, drink and dance and be merry. You’re sitting down with a water though, when Daniel approaches.
He grins at you and rests his hands on your shoulders. “All good, bub?”
You let your heel dangle off your foot, stretching it out with a groan. “I’m out of practice, my feet are killing me.”
Daniel laughs, digging his fingers into your shoulder muscles. “I think we have more than fulfilled our obligations and we can go, Actually. If you wanted to head off.” He offers his hands and uses them to pull you to your aching feet. “There’s a gigantic bath tub and a very nice bottle of wine at the hotel for us, I think.” He says as he kisses your cheek.
“Well, now you definitely have my interest.”
It takes another half an hour to do the rounds saying goodbye (you might manage to slip out easily enough, but Daniel is a capital P Presence in a room), so by the time you’re at the top of the stairs outside your feet are throbbing again. You might groan a bit.
“Here.” His suit jacket lands on your shoulders and Daniel stands in front of you expectantly. “Piggy back.”
You can’t help but laugh. “No, you’ll trip and we’ll fall.”
“That’s the most insulting thing anyone’s ever said to me.” He huffs. “C’mon. I got you.”
“If our children end up orphans I’m going to make your afterlife hell.” You threaten.
He laughs loudly as you slip off your shoes and jump onto his back. Daniel hooks his arms under your thighs and you can feel the smugness radiating off his face. “Ye of little faith.”
“You’ve made it one step.”
To his credit he makes it down all of the steps safely, and you’re both laughing by the bottom, sore feet forgotten at the prospect of the rest of the night to yourselves.
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lestappenforever · 1 year ago
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Stop (You're Losing Me) - Lestappen oneshot
Lestappen | Angst, smut & fluff | 6.3K | Sequel
Surprise, besties! Bet you thought you wouldn't be getting more sequels to "Devils Roll The Dice (Angels Roll Their Eyes)", but here we are and here you go: part 3!
Part 1: Devils Roll The Dice (Angels Roll Their Eyes)
Part 2: Like Snow At The Beach (Weird, But Fucking Beautiful)
Part 3: Stop (You're Losing Me)
This whole thing was born yesterday, after this particular part from a comment on one of my other fics, from the lovely @LightinDecember on AO3:
"Last thing I want to say is how much I would LOVE a bottom Max / top Charles fanfic ❀
How great it would be to see them switch roles in a short fic like this that can somehow be seen as an episodic sequel to Devils roll the dice !
Just a thought !"
So lovely, this one is for you. ❀
And as always, a special thank you to the ever lovely, ever wonderful Ilse (@f1writingbyme) for helping me pick the title for this, for being my biggest supporter every step of the way, and for hyping me up about every part I sent her during the writing process. You are my rock, always. 💕
Read the fic on AO3 here.
And you can read a little snippet below the cut.
Charles has replayed their wedding more times than he can count ever since that August day in 2025. It’s a day he looks back on with joy, the memory always filling his heart with warmth and putting the biggest smile on his face as he remembers the way Max had looked at him. How Max’s hand had felt holding his as he slid the wedding band onto his finger. How Charles’ heart had skipped a beat as he’d met Max’s eyes for the first time as spouses. How they’d held on to each other during their first dance, and how complete his life had felt as they’d fallen into bed together on their wedding night.
As Charles stands in the doorway to their shared F1 room three years later, where they keep every trophy, every helmet, every token, every memory from their respective careers so far, watching as Max spends yet another hour on his sim that has lead to him forgetting that it’s Friday and their weekly date night — again —, his mind replays their wedding vows for what feels like the millionth time in the past few months.
Only now Charles can’t help but notice how the joy that used to fill his heart at the memory has been replaced by an ache that he can no longer ignore. And the smile that once stretched over his lips whenever he thought about their wedding day is no longer present. In its place, there’s only the sting of unshed tears.
His gaze shifts to their trophy cabinet, where seven Driver’s World Champion trophies are lined up neatly next to each other. Six of them, from 2021, 2022, 2023, 2025, 2026, and 2027 all belong to Max, while Charles’ from 2024 is placed right in the middle. The sight of it makes him feel as empty as the sight of his husband, transfixed on the screen of his sim, seemingly trapped in a world where Charles doesn’t even exist.
"All relationships have one law. Never make the one you love feel alone, especially when you're there."
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